


See You in Class

by ARustySpork



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, F/M, Library, M/M, University
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-11
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2020-01-11 05:37:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 35,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18423954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ARustySpork/pseuds/ARustySpork
Summary: Marvin nodded. “Okay, but also, we have to stop whatever this is between us.”Whizzer raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”“I mean, that if we go out there and announce that we’ve been sleeping together for past several weeks, it’s gonna fuck everything up. The only reason I’m here is for Charlotte, and we’re not gonna ruin this for them.”





	1. Textbooks

**Author's Note:**

> Oops, I did it again
> 
> Seriously, I don't know what I'm doing here
> 
> When I started writing these, it was to improve my writing skills, and now we're four works deep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where they meet

If you asked a nine-year-old Marvin where he saw himself in ten years, he definitely wouldn’t have said “bashing his head against the library table at his university at ten O’clock at night.”

Why was he bashing his head against the table? Because he had been trying to write up a lab report on centripetal motion for the past three hours and hadn’t gotten anywhere. Why was the library open so late? That was a question Marvin didn’t feel like asking anyone out of fear that they would somehow realize “hey, maybe this is a weird time” and start closing it down early.

It was an irrational fear, but it wasn’t a risk Marvin was willing to take.

At this point in his life, these late library times were the only thing keeping him alive through this first semester. The place was open until 11 PM, and at this rate, that’s how late Marvin was gonna be there. Of course, the place was pretty barren at this point. The tables were empty, and all there was were a few stray students checking out some last-minute textbooks.

Marvin, on the other hand, was here to stay. He had splayed out across half the table, stacks of physics textbooks sat to his left, with thick binders and loose pieces of paper to his right. Marvin had an affinity for pencils, which was why there were about twenty in his pencil case, along with a series of erasers and sharpeners. His friends always made fun of him for keeping so many pencils on hand at a time, but then again, they were always the ones asking to borrow the pencils.

Of course, this was all off memory. He couldn’t see any of the things in front of him, because his face was currently embracing the table. This was rather difficult, as it caused his glasses to dig into his face. His glasses, which he would normally never be caught dead wearing, but ended up resorting to when his contacts made his eyes feel like they were about to fall out.

What Marvin really wanted to do, was scream at the stop of his lungs, but he felt that might be an unwise thing to do in the middle of a library.

He was snapped out of his self-pitying state as a large banging sound erupted out from right next to his ear. He jumped up in his seat, blinking a few times as he questioned whether or not that was a gunshot, not bothering to brush his curly hair out of his eyes.

Marvin turned to his right, where a boy about his age stood next to his table. Said boy had just dropped a rather large stack of physics textbooks onto the table, looking irritated. He was quite tall, wearing a baseball shirt and joggers, which hardly distracted from his impeccably styled hair.

Marvin raised his eyebrow.

“I need that book,” said the boy, crossing his arms and gesturing with his head to the blue textbook lying open in front of Marvin.

“I’m using it,” Marvin replied, really not in the mood to argue.

“Last time I checked, you were face-fucking the table, not reading a textbook.”

Marvin blinked, surprised at how blunt the guy was being. He quickly looked him up and down, unable to recognize him. Then again, he didn’t recognize most people in this place. He silently weighed the pros and cons. As much as he wanted to fight for this book since the guy seemed to be a bit of a prick, Marvin also knew that he really didn’t need the book that much.

Instead he sighed to himself, before reaching over and closing up the book to hand to the boy.

“Here,” Marvin said, meeting his eyes, “just be careful, some of the pages might be stained with tears.”

The boy snorted. Oh, look at that, he has emotions.

“You in Sonnabend’s class?” he asked.

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Ah, that lab report’s a bitch.”

Marvin raised his eyebrows in surprised. “You’re finished it already?”

The boy shrugged, shifting his weight to his other foot. “Only a few hours ago, lab reports are kind of my jam.”

“I think you’re the only person in the history of the universe that has ever said that sentence.”

“Hey, lots of people like writing lab reports.”

“No, I meant that you called something ‘your jam.’”

“Okay-”

“Honestly, I felt personally attacked-”

“It’s not that weird of a thing to say-”

“-I feel like I’ve be teleported to the eighties-”

“Okay, okay, I get it.”

Marvin couldn’t stop himself from grinning, something he shared with the other boy at this moment. This was what he needed, a break to just talk about nothing.

“I’m Whizzer,” said the boy, taking the book from Marvin’s hands rather than putting out his own to shake.

“Whizzer?” Marvin replied, it was more of a question than confirmation.

The so-called “Whizzer” rolled his eyes. This seemed like something he had been through before.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he said with a very apparent annoyance, “it sounds like-”

“As is the motorcycle?” Marvin interjected.

Whizzer blinked. “The what?”

“The motorcycle, like, from the fourties.”

“Oh, uh, I don’t know. That’s not usually what people think of when they hear my name.”

Marvin just shrugged. “Well, I’m Marvin.”

Whizzer nodded, seemingly appreciating that Marvin hadn’t chosen to do a deep-dive into the origins of Whizzer’s name. Now, the two rested opposite each other, in a slightly awkward silence.  
They had just met, but Marvin kind of didn’t want the guy to leave. Maybe it was the result of him sitting by himself in silence in the library for the past three hours.

“Do you mind if I sit here?” Whizzer asked, pointing at the chair at the opposite end of the table.

Marvin unconsciously raised his eyebrows, surprised that Whizzer would actually want to sit opposite of him in a library filled with empty tables. Whizzer quickly jumped to speak in an attempt to defend himself.

“It’s just,” he began, “if some axe murderer walks in here, all the other tables are closer to the door-”

“Right.”

“-and if I sit over here with you, then you’re closer to the door and he’ll go for you first-”

“Of course.”

“Then while you’re busy getting stabbed, I can run away while live tweeting it.”

Marvin smirked, appreciating this guy’s sense of humour.

“Yeah, you can sit here.”

Whizzer nodded, seemingly satisfied with his reasoning. He scooped up the pile of textbooks he had previously dropped on the table and carried them over to the second spot at the table. Silence resumed once again, as the two boys got to work. Marvin, scratching his pencil against a sheet of loose leaf, and Whizzer, typing what sounded like a billion words per minute. Marvin became so absorbed in his dumb lab report that he almost forgot the other guy was there.

“Marvin,” Whizzer whisper-yelled, effectively bringing him out of his trance.

Marvin looked up to see Whizzer zipping up his binders and shoving his laptop in his backpack.

“What?” Marvin whisper-yelled back.

“The librarians are giving us death glares, it’s almost eleven.”

Marvin looked down to check his phone. Yup, it was five to, he had hoped on being out of there 25 minutes ago. But since when had Marvin ever gotten what he wanted?

He packed up his stuff as quickly as he could, hoping to escape the watchful eye of Stacey the librarian. For some reason, Whizzer waited for Marvin to finish packing before leading him out the front door. It was October, not quite cold enough for jackets, but too cold for t-shirts. Sweater weather. Sweater weather was Marvin’s favourite weather, he got to bundle up and no one could question him about it.

They reached the Campus Road, and Marvin stopped for a brief moment to see which way Whizzer was going to go. Whizzer stopped too, secretly planning to do the same thing.

“I’m…going right,” Marvin said, glancing down at his hands.

“I’m going left,” Whizzer replied.

Marvin looked back up waiting to enjoy the moment before taking a step in any direction. Move, Marvin, move. He’d been looking forward to heading back to his dorm all day, why was he suddenly content with staying out a little longer?

“Well,” Whizzer began, “I guess I’ll see you around.”

Marvin nodded, wishing he was better at making good words come out of his mouth.

With a wink and a curt nod, Whizzer was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the deal, I impulse wrote this.
> 
> I'm feeling a little iffy about the storyline, so let me know what you think.


	2. Coffee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Marvin has friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey, we're back
> 
> I know the grouping is a little weird, but I had to do it this way to make the story line work
> 
> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

“What the FUCK is up Kyle?!”

Marvin sighed, dumping his backpack at his feet.

“I swear to god if you quote any more vines at me, I’m going to spontaneously combust.”

Charlotte shrugged, not bothering to hide the huge grin plastered across her face. Trina sat beside her, chugging her cup of tea.

The three were an unlikely grouping, none of them even had the same major. Charlotte in medicine, Trina in teaching, and Marvin in engineering. The only thing that bound them was their put-togetherness. Marvin, of course, would constantly oppose this “fact,” despite what the girls said. They were far more put together than he would ever be, he just hid behind that illusion since he was in a STEM field.

They met during their second week of university. It was early in the morning, and the coffee shop they were currently sat in was filled to the brim. Marvin was violently attempting to scribble his notes onto flash cards when two girls slid into the booth seats across from his table, unannounced. Trina and Charlotte were newly roommates at the time, and had silently decided that Marvin looked too disoriented to try to hit on them if they sat with him. From that day on, the three friends had become inseparable.

Well, sort of inseparable. Their schedules didn’t usually match up, but when they did, they hung out at the café.

“Here,” said Trina, sliding over a cup of coffee as if it were a drug deal, “I got the stuff.”

“Wow, thanks,” Marvin replied sarcastically, selecting to nurse the coffee cup rather than extend the conversation.

The girls knew he wasn’t a morning person, they knew the drill. Marvin sat in silence wrapped around his cup as he listened to them speak. He had to leave in like, five minutes anyway, he had Sonnabend’s class starting soon anyways.

“So, I was out for lunch with Mendel,” Trina started, twirling around a stir stick in her drink.

Ah, Mendel Weisenbachfeld, Trina’s boyfriend. They had been together for a while before the three of them met. Marvin didn’t know a lot about the guy, they had only met a few times. He knew that he was a psychology major, he had an abundance of knitted sweaters, and he was awkwardly sweet. Charlotte knew Mendel much better than he did, in fact she, Mendel, and Trina would sometimes hang out when Marvin had classes.

“And we bumped into some of his friends, who ended up joining us,” she continued.

Charlotte raised an eyebrow, “and this is interesting because…?”

“Because there was this girl, Cordelia.”

Charlotte suddenly grew more attentive.

“A girl?” she asked, her voice raising a few octaves.

Marvin laughed, “damn, Charlotte, your gay is showing.”

“Shut up,” Charlotte blushed, keeping her eyes trained on Trina.

“So, her name is Cordelia,” Trina continued, “she’s pretty, super sweet, and she’s in culinary arts. I think you’d really like her, I was thinking maybe I could get Mendel to bring her along and the four of us could go on a double date that’s disguised as, like, a casual meet-up.”

Charlotte nodded, pretending to be cool about it, but Marvin could see the giddiness building up behind her otherwise cool expression. Trina continued to drone on about this Cordelia girl, allowing Marvin to just sit back and enjoy the show. He was caught off guard by his phone vibrating in his pocket. It was his alarm, telling him to get the hell to class.

“Aight, well, I’ve gotta go,” Marvin said, standing up from his seat and scooping up his coffee in his hands.

All he received from the girls was a nod, they were still absorbed in their conversation. Their classes didn’t start until much later in the day, but the joke was on them, Marvin had the evenings off. Well, not really, he didn’t have classes, but he spent any free time he had doing homework and assignments.

He began his walk to the engineering building, which had too many stairs for Marvin’s taste. The path through campus was mostly empty this early in the morning, the cobblestone road only had a few stray students on the way to their morning classes. Marvin continued slurping on his black coffee like his life depended on it.

Sure, there was an elevator that was perfectly capable of carrying him up these five floors, but elevators were small and cramped and were just as capable at breaking down and suffocating him. Hence, the stairs.

The lecture hall Sonnabend’s class was in was kind of humongous. The stair-like incline of the floor was lined with rows of spinny chairs and long tables. Marvin took his usual seat, in the centre row all the way at the left side against the wall. He didn’t know anyone in this class, so the seats beside him were normally filled with interchangeable strangers. 

The hall was already filled about halfway, mostly people taking up the back rows. Marvin spread out the contents of his backpack across the table in front of him. This class was really beginning to drive him insane, he was top of his class in high school, and now he just felt below average.

He heard a squeak of the chair as someone took the seat beside him.

“Hey.”

Marvin turned his head to see the boy from last night occupying the seat.

“Whizzer.”

“Marvin.”

Whizzer seemed mostly unaffected by the early morning. He had a coffee cup of his own sitting in front of him as he unpacked his messenger bag.

“What brings you here?” Marvin asked.

“Honestly,” Whizzer began, pausing to take a sip from his drink, “I normally sit at the back, but it was kind of depressing seeing you sit here all alone.”

“Wow, what a philanthropist.”

“I know, right? Anyway, you finish the lab?”

Marvin sighed dramatically. He reached into his binder and pulled out a thick stack of paper that had been stapled together, dropping it onto the table with a satisfying thud.

“I guess it’s technically finished, but it also makes me sad just looking at it.”

Whizzer chuckled. There was something entrancing about his laugh.

“You know,” he said, “if you ever need help with one of those reports, you should call me up.”

Marvin’s eyes widened slightly. 

“Uh…yeah, totally, I mean, that’d be-” he awkwardly cleared his throat “-good.”

Marvin wasn’t sure if Whizzer meant _literally_ call him up, since Marvin didn’t actually have his phone number. Marvin was saved from having to make any more conversation as Professor Sonnabend entered. About one hour and a whole lot of psychological pain later, the lecture was over.

Marvin hurriedly shoved his stuff back into his bag. He had an hour until his next lecture, and he usually seized this time to take a quick nap before returning to class. 

Marvin was planning on heading to his dorm, which was why it was a complete 100% absolute definite coincidence when he and Whizzer found themselves walking side-by-side out of the building and down the stone path.

Despite the fact that they had been awake for two hours, it was far too early in the morning to uphold a conversation. They just walked in silence, not acknowledging that they were with one another. Marvin didn’t know if he could really call Whizzer his friend, they had only met yesterday and most of their conversations had consisted of passive aggressively insulting each other. Yet, it was nice to know someone in his class, even if they were a bit of a prick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!
> 
> Things get wacky next chapter


	3. Laundry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Marvin uses a washing machine

This was a mistake.

The room was cold and empty, the cement floor and lack of windows in this underground hell only made Marvin grow more uncomfortable. The washing machines were laughing at him.

This was the first time since he had moved into the university that he had to do laundry. The last time, his laundry needs had lined up with his visit home, where he managed to convince his mom to do it for him, other times, he was able to put his clothes in with Trina or Charlotte’s load.

Maybe Marvin should have chosen to do his laundry when the place would have had more people in it, so they could ask them for help. Or maybe he could have waited until Charlotte or Trina were available to teach him, their lives were much more put together than his.

Instead, Marvin had resorted to curling up on the floor and clutching his knees against his chest as he leaned against the washing machine. It was past midnight, and Marvin’s life was in shambles. There were Tide PODS littered across the room, his laundry basket had been thrown against the room only to rebound onto the coffee table in the waiting area. The only upside to his whole ordeal was that Marvin didn’t have any classes tomorrow, which mostly compensated from the sleep depravation he was gonna experience from being awake this late.

He had been down there for the better half of an hour, getting nowhere. There was not a person in sight, no one he could ask for assistance. What he needed was to get this done, because he was seriously running out of clothes. He was far too embarrassed to walk up to student services or something just to ask a middle-aged woman how to use the fucking washing machine.

As Marvin buried his head in his hands, he heard the door to the laundry room open and close. He didn’t even bother to look up out of sheer humiliation.

“Should I be surprised?” a humourous voice asked.

Fuck, Marvin recognized that voice.

“Are you following me or something?” Marvin shot back, finally lifting his head.

Whizzer held up his hands in mock surrender, “hey, I don’t think anyone wants to follow you if it means having to deal with your stellar personality.”

Marvin rolled his eyes before dropping his head back into his hands. Whizzer carried over canvas bag half-filled with clothes and set it on top of the washing machine.

“You alright there?” he asked, as he opened the machine and began putting his clothes in.

Marvin stumbled to his feet, then crossed his arms in an attempt to seem intimidating.

“I’m great, why do you ask?”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

“Because it seems like you don’t know how to use a washing machine.”

“Um, no, I definitely know how to use a washing machine, I’m just choosing not to.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, that is so, it is so so that it so-ed all over this joint.”

“So, if you know how to use a washing machine, why don’t you go ahead and do that right now.”

“Uh…no.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to?”

“Are you asking me a question?”

“No, I am definitively stating that I do not want to and that is the only reason I am not doing it right now.”

“So…then why are you in the laundry room?”

Marvin hesitated, giving Whizzer the opening to smirk and give Marvin a look that said he had proved a point.

“How bout this,” Whizzer started, taking a step closer to Marvin, “out of reason of conserving water, you can put your laundry in with mine.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, sure, to…”

“Conserve water.”

“To conserve water.”

Marvin nodded, then spun around to take his clothes from the washing machine and put them into the one Whizzer was using. Unbeknownst to him, Whizzer was looking him up and down.

Once Marvin had moved all his clothes into the new washer, Whizzer popped in one his Tide PODS before closing it and walking over to the card reader attached to the wall. Marvin watched him with prying eyes, not so subtly trying to figure out how to do this for next time.

Whizzer slid his student card into the scanner and typed in the number of his washing machine. A few seconds later, the machine turned on and started the cycle. Huh, it was that easy.

Marvin hoisted himself up onto a row of washing machines and sat with his legs dangling down. Whizzer took the row opposite Marvin, choosing to nonchalantly lean against them as he looked towards Marvin.

“So, why are you doing laundry at two in the morning?” he asked, running his hand through his dumb perfect hair.

“I should ask you the same thing.”

“Touché.”

Marvin kicked his legs against the front of the machine he was sitting on. He quickly realized he regretted not bringing his phone down here, after all, this cycle was gonna take, like, and hour. He simultaneously drummed his fingernails against the metal, mimicking the beat of a song stuck in his head.

“Hey Marvin?”

Marvin looked up.

“Yeah?”

“Could you maybe shut the fuck up?”

Marvin narrowed his eyes, “I wasn’t saying anything.”

“Yeah, but you’re beating that washing machine to a pulp and it’s driving me insane.”

“I’m barely even making a sound.”

“In fact, your presence in general is bothering me.”

“You’re kind of a prick, you know.”

Whizzer crossed his arms. “Oof, you’ve got me there. Right in the feels.”

“Asshole,” Marvin muttered, shaking his head.

Whizzer pushed himself up from where he was previously leaning and took a few steps, so he was closer to Marvin.

“Hey, I’m not an asshole, I’m a gorgeous, stylish, and beloved by everyone.”

“Agree to disagree.”

“How bout we agree that I’m right, and you have no sense of style.”

“Hey, I have style.”

“Tell that to your wash-and-wear.”

Whizzer reached forward and tugged on the neck of Marvin’s clothes to check the tag. Normally, Marvin would jerk away from Whizzer, but something made him stay put. It had been a week since Whizzer had first started sitting next to him in class, and he had continued to do so since then. They would usually just argue and bicker, Marvin didn’t know why Whizzer hadn’t gone back to where he usually sat. He also didn’t know why he didn’t move spots himself.

Marvin looked straight ahead at Whizzer. One lock of hair fell away from the rest, resting on his forehead. Not that Marvin noticed these things, of course.

“Great, you’re a prick and you’re self centered.”

“Only one of those things is true.”

“Your hair is messed up.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.”

“I will.”

“Wha-”

Let’s just say, Whizzer didn’t lie when he said he’d make Marvin shut up. But Marvin didn’t expect his method of doing so to be grabbing him by the back of the neck and kissing him right on his lips. 

He also found himself asking why he wasn’t pulling away, because he and Whizzer definitely weren’t friends, nor did anything about their relationship scream “lovers.” But no, instead he put his arms around Whizzer’s neck and his legs around his waist as he allowed himself to deepen the kiss.

This had all happened very quickly, much quicker than anything Marvin had ever done before. But for now, he decided he wasn’t going to hold back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, that was fast.
> 
> The main idea when I first wrote this was to kind of explore the repercussions of their relationship after this, so it's all downhill from here.
> 
> Let me know what you think!


	4. Stairs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where they take the stairs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey dudes
> 
> The lawn thing was based on what I heard in an audio book on philosophy and evolution because I'm that weirdo that listens to audio books about philosophy I guess

“Looks like someone had a fun night.”

Marvin’s eyes flew wide as he looked up from his coffee mug. It was the one day of the week where none of them had any classes, so they decided to go out for lunch. All the conversation had been normal up until now, could they have known what happened? No, it was impossible, just play it cool. Playing things cool had never been Marvin’s strong suit.

“W-What?” he said in a totally not at all suspicious voice.

“You’re wearing clean clothes,” Trina said, slightly surprised she had to explain herself, “I assume you figured out the washing machine.”

“Oh, yeah, I mean, obviously yes. I totally knew that’s what you meant.”

Trina raised an eyebrow, but didn’t push further. 

“So…” she continued, “I talked to Mendel about that date, and he thinks it’s a great idea.”

Marvin rolled his eyes, “he thinks anything that comes out of your mouth is a good idea. The guy has the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.”

“Anyways…” she continued, sending a glare Marvin’s way, “we were thinking Wednesday? For lunch?”

Charlotte shrugged, pretending like she didn’t care, even though she clearly did. That was a strong suit of Charlotte’s, she could switch from being care-free to dead serious in seconds flat.

Marvin reached forward and grabbed the last fry from their tray and popped it into his mouth.

“Wow, bitch,” Charlotte said with a glare.

Marvin held up his hands in surrender, “hey, it’s been sitting there for five minutes and no one’s touched it.”

“That’s because we have a shred of human decency.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “Whatever, let’s dip, I have some notes to work on anyways.”

The trio stood up, and each of them tossed a five on the table to cover the bill. They began the short trek to Trina and Charlotte’s dorm. The three of them always hung out there, since it was bigger than Marvin’s, who had a single dorm.

“So I was listening to this audiobook,” Marvin began.

He was now situated under a pile of Trina’s blankets, spread out on the floor. Trina was on Charlotte’s bed, and Charlotte at her desk.

“Oh, do go on,” Charlotte drawled, imitating interest.

“It talked about how for forever lawns were a symbol of wealth because it took all this land and water and money to maintain the grass for what was an essentially useless plot of land and now it’s turned into this billion dollar industry for suburban moms and it’s like what become of humanity ya know?”

The girls simultaneously made a non-committal sound.

Marvin flopped over onto his stomach and sighed dramatically. Both Charlotte and Trina continued in their studies, unaffected by their friend mimicking a beached whale in the middle of the dorm room.

“There’s this guy in my anatomy class,” Charlotte started, “that brings in a full foot-long sub into class every. Single. Day.”

Trina scrunched up her face. “Is he, like, nice about it? Because there’s a girl in my English that brings in boiled eggs to eat every once in a while, and it is the most disgusting thing. The professor never says anything about it though, I’m pretty sure he has no sense of smell because I want to straight up pass out.”

“Ugh,” Charlotte shuddered, “I actually hate boiled eggs, they’re probably the worst food out there. They smell terrible and they’re disgusting.”

“And the weird thing is, her boyfriend comes and picks her up after every class and they, like, make out right outside the doorway. First of all, PDA is gross, second, how can you make out with someone who has egg breath?”

Charlotte turned to Marvin. “Thoughts, Marvin?”

Marvin cleared his throat, failing to fight the fact that his voice had just raised an octave. “Me? Oh, I wouldn’t know anything about making out with egg people, in fact, I wouldn’t know anything about making out with people in general, it has been soooo long.”

Charlotte blinked. “Right, okay.”

Marvin was the least inconspicuous person in the universe. He wasn’t even sure what he was trying to be inconspicuous about, what happened with Whizzer was totally whatever, it wasn’t even a big deal.

“Actually, you know what,” Marvin starting, beginning to stand up, “I actually just remembered that I left my laptop in my dorm, so I should definitely go get that.”

Without another word, he escaped into the halls. What he really needed was a breather. Even though Marvin was acting like a complete lunatic, Charlotte and Trina didn’t seem to be questioning it much. That was probably more concerning than anything else.

He stumbled down the stairs and into the bright light of the afternoon. Why was Marvin being so weird anyways? He wasn’t trying to hide anything, well, not really. It’s not like he had a girlfriend or something, and this was a scandalous affair. He was free to do what he wanted, and that was maybe kind of a little bit what he wanted.

He was about fifty metres down the stone path when he remembered that he lived in the same building as Trina and Charlotte. After doing a mental face palm, he spun around and retreated back to the door. When he reached the door, however, Marvin realized that he had left his lanyard with his key card in the girls’ room.

Fuck.

Considering that Marvin was kind of a mess, it was a bit surprising that this was the first time this had ever happened to him. Being the genius he was, Marvin reached for his phone. He could just text one of the girls to open the door for him.

And of course, he also forgot his phone in their room.

Double fuck.

So what would any rational person do in this situation? Sit outside the door and ponder his existence until someone showed up. He was probably there for about twenty minutes when the metal door finally swung open. Marvin leapt to his feet to be met face to face with his saviour.

“We keep meeting like this, huh, Marv?”

Marvin narrowed his eyes. Of course, Whizzer would be the one to find him.

“Like what?”

“You, a damsel in distress, me, swooping in and saving the day.”

Marvin crossed his arms. “Who says I’m in distress?”

Whizzer raised his eyebrows. “You’re telling me you didn’t forget your key?”

Marvin took a quick breath. He could argue with Whizzer, or he could get back inside the building. He decided to go with the latter.

“Can you let me in?”

Whizzer smiled. “Of course, boo.”

Marvin glared at the pet name, but followed Whizzer inside nonetheless. The building had three sets of key systems to get inside. One outside the building, one in the stairwell outside each floor, and one at each dorm.

“What floor you on?” Whizzer asked, following up the several flights of stairs.

“Six.”

“Holy shit, why don’t you just take the elevator?”

Marvin stopped in place, spinning in the middle of the stairwell to face Whizzer. They stood staggered, a lot closer together than Marvin had intended. Now that Marvin was situated slightly higher up than Whizzer, they were able to stare each other face to face.

“Why don’t you take the elevator?”

Whizzer shrugged, “I’m trying to avoid someone.”

“Well that’s not weird at all.”

“You’re right, it’s not. But seriously, why are you always taking the stairs?”

“Exercise?”

“You keep doing that, you keep answering things as questions which makes me think that you’re lying.”

Marvin turned around and continued up the stairs, electing not to reply. Whizzer stumble after him in an attempt to keep up. After many months of taking the stairs, Marvin had become quite quick.  
He finally reached the entrance of the sixth floor, with Whizzer following up a few moments later.

“Jesus fuck,” he huffed, “you’re like a goddamn squirrel.”

Marvin looked expectantly at the door, waiting for Whizzer to open it. However, Whizzer paused, leaning against the wall and looking Marvin up and down.

“What?” Marvin asked.

“You know, if my roommate weren’t in my dorm right now, I would take you up there and make you lose that adorable little NASA shirt, among other things.”

Marvin blinked.

“Noted,” he replied.

Whizzer reached into his leather jacket, which made him look way cooler than Marvin would ever admit, and took out his key. He swiped it through the scanner as a click rang out, then swung open the metal door.

Marvin was just about to leave, but then he made a split-second decision. He reached over, grabbed Whizzer by the shirt collar, and planted a firm kiss on Whizzer’s lips. When he pulled back, Whizzer had a surprised look on his face, clearly not expecting Marvin to make such a bold move.

Marvin stepped back and ran a hand quickly through his hair to make him seem a little more put together.

“See you in class, Whizzer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get exciting next chapter
> 
> Thanks for your feedback, let me know, what do you want to see happen with Whizzer and Marvin's relationship?
> 
> Tell me what ya think, seeya in a bit


	5. Birthday Cake & Coconuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Marvin doesn't take a nap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm projecting the pain of doing physics into writing this I guess
> 
> also the next two are a little long sorry

Marvin felt like his brain was about to explode.

He had been listening to his professor drone on about the theory of relatively for the past fifty-five minutes. It wasn’t helping that during that entire time, Whizzer had been tapping his pencil back and forth against his paper. That was almost driving him more insane than the physics.

He reached across the table and put his hand over Whizzer’s in order to stop the excessive pencil tapping. He kept looking straight ahead at the professor the entire time, but he could still feel Whizzer’s eyes on him.

After a few minutes, Marvin realized what he was doing. He was holding Whizzer’s hand. This hadn’t been his intent when he reached his hand over, but it was certainly what he was doing. Luckily, he was saved from trying to decide how to exit the situation as they were dismissed from the lecture by their professor.

Without speaking, Marvin got up and retreated out the door. He began his descent down the stairs, thinking he was free. Of course, Marvin never got what he wanted. He heard the door above him open and close, and then a pair of far too fancy shoes as they barrelled down the stairs after him.

“You’re taking the stairs again,” Whizzer pointed out, catching up to Marvin quickly due to his ridiculously long legs. The man could scale Everest in two strides.

“I’m aware,” Marvin replied, still not looking Whizzer in the eye as he continued down the stairwell.

“Why don’t you just take the elevator, like a normal person?”

“I never said I was a normal person.”

He could hear the smile on Whizzer’s face as he chuckled, no doubt his stupidly perfect teeth were widely on display. Whizzer continued to follow Marvin as they reached to outdoors, walking down the stone path.

Marvin finally pried his eyes away from his path and looked at Whizzer in the afternoon light. He was just in jeans, a t-shirt, and a leather jacked, yet he managed to resemble the style of someone in a full tuxedo. How he did that, Marvin didn’t know.

“Do you have a roommate?” Whizzer asked, out of the blue.

They were beginning to reach the dormitory, and Marvin had questioned several times during this short trek why exactly Whizzer was choosing to walk with him.

“No,” Marvin answered. He didn’t know why Whizzer needed this information, but he wasn’t about to lie.

“We should go there.”

Marvin raised his eyebrows. “Why?”

Whizzer checked his watch before turning to Marvin. “We have, like, an hour before our next class. We should have time for us to screw before then.”

Marvin blinked. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“Wait, are you serious right now?”

“Does it look like I’m joking?”

Marvin paused for a moment in disbelief. “We can’t-just, I barely- and you- we can’t just-”

“We can’t what?”

“We can’t just run off and go fuck each other in the middle of the day.”

“Why not?”

Whizzer’s logic was really annoying him, mostly because he was kind of right. Marvin hesitated for a long while, trying to come up with an excuse, even though he wasn’t sure why he was trying to find one. Maybe it was just to spite Whizzer, since his idea wasn’t so bad.

Whizzer rolled his eyes and took a breath, as if this hold up was causing him annoyance. “Are you saying you don’t want to sleep with me right now?”

“…I mean, I never said that.”

_________________________________

Marvin sat under his covers as he watched Whizzer get dressed. The taller boy leaned closer to the mirror attached to the closet to better see himself while fixing his hair. Marvin would never admit that he was staring, but he was definitely staring. What more could he say? The guy was good looking.

“Where are you going?” Marvin asked, sounding needier than initially intended.

Whizzer shrugged, still adjusting his hair. “We’ve still got time before class, I’ve got plans to meet up with someone for lunch.”

“You had lunch plans, but you still took the time to come over here and have sex with me?”

Whizzer turned to Marvin, making a cheesy face and speaking with an evident hint of sarcasm. “I always have time for you, Marv.”

Marvin scoffed, reaching to the floor to pick up his shirt.

“So,” Marvin began, trying to sound as casual as possible, “are we gonna keep doing this?”

Whizzer looked back to Marvin as he slipped on his shoes. He had an expression that could only be read as “…oh.”

“Look, Marvin,” he started. Yeah, this was not gonna be good. “I don’t really do relationships.”

Marvin’s eyes widened as he desperately attempted to backtrack.

“No, I mean, I don’t want that either. Totally, I just meant, if this-” he gestured wildly between the two of them “-is gonna keep happening.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow, a smirk slowly forming on his face.

“Are you asking if I want to keep having sex with you?”

“I mean-I was just, that’s not what I-but if that’s like, you know,” Marvin stuttered.

Whizzer walked forward, careful to step around Marvin’s loose clothing.

“You’re adorable when you’re flustered.”

“I’m not flustered.”

Marvin furrowed his eyebrows. He was not adorable. Whizzer leaned forward, pressing his soft lips to Marvin’s. Whizzer’s lips tasted like birthday cake lip balm and he smelled like coconut shampoo. Two things that would normally never go together, but somehow worked at that moment.

Whizzer pulled away, much to Marvin’s dismay. He began backing up towards the door.

“Sure,” he said.

“Sure what?”

“Sure, we can keep doing this. I mean, I’m having fun.”

“Yeah, right, I mean, good, okay.”

Whizzer still had a smirk plastered on his face. Whizzer always seemed to take pleasure in Marvin’s discomfort. God, what a prick. Marvin would normally question why he was sleeping with this guy at all, but that question was pretty well answered just a few minutes ago.

Whizzer grabbed his leather jacket from Marvin’s desk chair and pulled it around his arms.

And with a smile and a wink, Whizzer was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hey hey
> 
> tell me what ya think


	6. All Shook Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Marvin doesn't eat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, that was fast
> 
> This was the chapter that kind of inspired this whole thing. I had to split it into two chapters since it was kinda long, so here's the first half.

“So where are we going, exactly?”

He sat in the back of Charlotte’s car, leaning forward so his head was hovering in between the two girls. Trina had planned a meetup with Mendel and his friends, promising to bring Marvin and Charlotte. The only problem was, she had neglected to tell Marvin about this beforehand. It’s not that he didn’t like Mendel, who was nice enough, he just wasn’t great in new social situations. He was sure that Cordelia and whatever other friends Mendel was bringing along would be great, but Marvin really was not in the mood to meet new people.

“It’s this diner Cordelia loves,” Charlotte said, turning in her seat in order to face Marvin.

“Ooooh, Cordeeelia,” Marvin teased.

Charlotte hadn’t stopped gushing about Cordelia since she had gone on that double date with her, Mendel, and Trina. Marvin was glad she was happy, but the girl did not shut up. Even more so than usual. At the very least, Marvin was glad he was finally going to meet her. However, it did feel weird knowing he was about to intrude on their already established dynamic.

“Shut up,” Charlotte blushed. “Anyways, it’s cool and 50s themed, it’s got like the red booths and stuff.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty dope,” Trina chimed in, “apparently they already go there all the time, so, it should be good.”

Marvin flopped backward into his seat. Maybe if he were lucky, he could just lie low and sink into the booth, no one would even notice him. Maybe he and Mendel could talk about sweaters or something.

Trina pulled into the parking lot of the diner. The sun was almost below the horizon, so the LED lights outlining the corners of the building were lit up, illuminating the darkness of the night. The trio hopped out of the car and began the short walk up to the building. Speakers were playing Elvis songs towards the parking lot, the music continuing as they entered the diner. Marvin led them to an empty corner booth stepping along to the beat of _All Shook Up_.

The diner was mostly empty at this time of day. That wasn’t to say it was dreary, it was lively as ever. The staff was chatting enthusiastically, some dancing along to the music that Marvin could now see was being controlled by a jukebox in the corner. Note to Marvin: play something on it later.

Marvin allowed the girls to slide in first, taking a seat along the edge. They strategically sat on one side of the booth, ensuring that Charlotte sat closest to the center with the intent that she’s be sitting next to Cordelia.

A waitress on roller-skates rolled by, welcoming them with a wide smile.

“Hey there,” she greeted. She looked like a high-schooler, no older than eighteen. “Is it just the three of you?”

“There should be six of us soon,” Trina said, with an equally large smile. She was like one of those moms who pretended they had a perfect family when it was really falling apart. The thing was, the family actually was perfect, and she just seemed like she was faking it since no one in the entire world could be that happy. Yet, she was.

The waitress nodded and skated away, before returning shortly with a pile of menus. She dropped them on the table, then retreated with a smile.

Marvin picked up one of the menus and started examining it. It had a punch-out card stock constructible car. Probably for children, but you could bet your ass Marvin was gonna build it anyways.

“Alright guys, there they are,” Marvin heard Charlotte say.

Marvin’s course of action was to act like he didn’t even notice them walking in. That way, he could act as chill as possible, and he wouldn’t have to acknowledge their existence. He continued to build the car with scientist-like concentration.

He saw the rest of the booth begin to fill up out of the corner of his eye. Marvin realized that he was going to have to actually say something. He looked up from his car, prepared to greet Mendel. Instead, he was brought face to face with Whizzer.

Of fucking course he was, because that’s who it always was, right?

Marvin’s mouth was frozen halfway open, as he saw that stupid pretty face sitting across from him. No one seemed to notice the subtle double-take Whizzer did, as it seamlessly shifted into a humorous smirk.

“Marvin,” Trina said, completely oblivious to the mini internal freakout that was going on in Marvin’s head, “this is Whizzer and Cordelia, Whizzer, Cordelia, this is Marvin.”

Marvin barely muffled the raspy “hello” that came out of his mouth, but nobody noticed anyway. He was still staring at Whizzer, who was staring back.

“Well,” said Mendel, matching Trina’s enthusiastic tone, “I’m glad we’ve all gotten to meet up like this now.”

Mendel was a short man. He had curly brown hair, along with a never-ending array of knitted sweaters. Marvin noticed as Mendel often nervously rung out his hands. Cordelia was sitting in between him and Charlotte. She had curly blonde hair cut into a bob. She also had a contagious smile that seemed to be bursting at the seams. Marvin also saw the way she looked at Charlotte and the way Charlotte looked back.

He returned his gaze to Whizzer, who was resting his head on his hand, looking at Marvin. Probably to see how he was reacting to all of this.

“I’m gonna go to the washroom,” Marvin stuttered out, quickly sliding out of the booth and marching towards the men’s bathroom.

He stumbled through the door and rested his hands on the sink counter. Of course this would happen to him. Whizzer always seemed to be around every corner. He hadn’t told either of the girls about their arrangement because…because. It didn’t matter, he didn’t need an arrangement. But now, Whizzer had popped up again, right in front of his friends group.

Marvin heard to bathroom door open and close, then a familiar face appeared in the bathroom mirror. Marvin spun around to look at Whizzer, who was hovering close behind him

“The hell are you doing in here?”

“I thought you wanted me to follow you,” Whizzer explained.

“What? Why would you think that?”

“You did that thing with your eyes.”

“What? No, I didn’t. I don’t do any things with my eyes.”

“I see you, like, everyday. I know you do a thing.”

“I don’t-never mind. Look, I don’t know what’s happening here, but we need to stop.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow, inviting Marvin to continue on. He walked over to the sink and hoisted himself up so he could sit and watch as Marvin paced back and forth. If anyone else was wearing Whizzer’s outfit, they would seem overdressed, but not Whizzer. He was wearing probably too tight high-waisted pants and a tucked in button down all under his regular brown leather jacket. That was one of Whizzer’s superpowers. He could wear a fucking wedding dress and make it seem casual if that’s what the situation entailed. He could also wear sweatpants to a gala and be the fanciest person there. 

“Okay, first order of business,” Marvin began, “what the fuck are you doing here?”

Whizzer cocked his head and crossed his arms. “I’m Mendel’s roommate, and Cordelia’s best friend.”

“So this whole time, when they’ve been telling me I just _had_ to come to this thing and meet Mendel’s friends, it was you all along?”

“I suppose so.”

Marvin huffed. “Look, the only reason I came here was to see the girl Charlotte’s been gushing about nonstop for the past how long, and now you’re stuck in the mix. Look, this-” he gestured wildly in between them “-needs to stop. Because the last thing I want is to fuck up any relationship that might be sparking between them.”

Whizzer suddenly perked up. “Really?”

“Yes, really, we can’t just keep fucking on the side-”

“No, I mean you really think Charlotte likes Cordelia back?”

Marvin raised his eyebrows. He did not think that was where he was going with this conversation.

“Uh, definitely, she won’t shut up about how interesting her baking stories are.”

Whizzer scrunched up his face. “They really aren’t that interesting.”

“I gathered.”

Whizzer hopped down from the sink in order to pace with Marvin. “Cordelia’s had her head in the clouds ever since that first double date thing a few weeks ago. They seriously need to get together before my eardrums implode.”

Marvin stopped, coming to a realization as he did a tiny gasp of utter joy. “Oh my god! We could Parent Trap the hell out of them.”

Normally, Whizzer would make fun of how excited Marvin was getting over this, but part of him really didn’t want to ruin the moment. Honestly, it was kind of adorable. Instead, he thought he might as well join in on the enthusiasm.

“So, we going matchmaker on this?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“We have to, just based on the way they look at each other, I think it would be a crime against humanity not to get them together.”

“Okay, how bout this, all we have to do is drop hints to them, make sure they know that they like each other. We’ve also got to make sure they keep seeing one another, and then, like, make excuses to leave them alone.”

Marvin nodded. “Okay, but also, we have to stop whatever _this_ is between us.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, that if we go out there and announce that we’ve been sleeping together for past several weeks, it’s gonna fuck everything up. The only reason I’m here is for Charlotte, and we’re not gonna ruin this for them.”

“I mean,” Whizzer started, “just because you don’t want them to know, doesn’t mean we have to stop. We could just keep it between us.”

Marvin hesitated for a brief moment before making up his mind. “No, it’s better this way. From now on, this is strictly a business association.”

“So…you don’t want me to give you a blowjob in that stall over there?”

“What? Whizzer! No.”

Whizzer waited expectantly.

“I mean, not _now_.”


	7. Soup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Mendel spills soup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw Avengers: Endgame and I'm a shell of my former self.

“I’m telling you, this Caroline girl is driving me insane. She just keeps berating me with stories about how she slept with her boss and I really don’t know what I’m supposed to do in this situation.”

Marvin didn’t expect to be walking in on such a heavy conversation when he finally returned to the table. Whizzer was supposed to follow him out a few minutes later, by Marvin’s suggestion. Marvin slipped back into his seat, where a drink was already waiting for him.

“I got you a lemonade,” Trina said, gesturing to the drink with her head, “I hope that’s okay.”

“It’s perfect,” Marvin confirmed, sending a warm smile her way.

Trina smiled back, then laced her arm through Marvin’s. Trina was affectionate like that, she always needed to be leaning into someone. Marvin looked across the booth to Mendel, who was trading looks in between Trina and Marvin. He hoped the poor guy wasn’t jealous, he hadn’t a clue.

“Okay,” Cordelia said, in an exuberant tone, “what are we thinking of getting?”

“We should just get like twelve trays of fries and nothing else,” Trina proposed, half joking, and half definitely not joking at all.

“Ooh, how bout this,” Charlotte proposed, “I used to do this thing with my siblings every time we’d eat out. We each get a grilled cheese, then split a bowl of tomato soup between two people so we can dip the sandwiches in.”

The group silently looked around at each other, waiting for any objections.

“Okay,” Mendel shrugged, “I guess that’s what we’re doing.”

At that moment, Whizzer slid into his seat so smoothly he was barely noticed by the rest of the booth.

“What’d I miss?” He asked, resting his chin on his fist.

“We’re getting grilled cheeses,” Charlotte grinned, glad her idea was adopted by everyone else.

“Phenomenal,” Whizzer deadpanned, “I approve.”

Once she saw that the gang was all there, the waitress returned to take their orders. After she left, the group enveloped into their own separate conversation. Mendel and Trina started talking about something she was learning in her math course, and Charlotte was telling Cordelia the story about the time she broke her foot by kicking one of her classmates in elementary school. It was a good story.

Marvin excluded himself from the narrative. He resumed the work he was doing constructing the cardstock car, which was coming along nicely. There was this sheet of stickers that came with the menu that had designs for the car. He began evaluating the best spots to put them.

He heard a rustling coming from the spot across from him. Whizzer reached across the table and snatched the sticker sheet out of Marvin’s hands.

“The hell?” Marvin said, not loud enough for the others to notice.

Whizzer leaned forward across the table in order to talk to Marvin without the others hearing. He flipped the sticker sheet around in his hand as he examined the options.

“You should hold off on the stickers,” he proposed, “what if we combined two of the cars together?”

Marvin raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “Why?”

“Well,” Whizzer continued. He moved his mug of hot chocolate to the side to make space on the table in between them. “So these things are meant to fit, like, the trays of fries in them so they have a cool border. If we combined our two nets, we could make something following a limousine theme, but make it capable of fitting both our sandwiches and the soup.”

Marvin would be lying if he said he wasn’t at least mildly impressed at how well Whizzer had though this out. Now that he mentioned it, what he said kind of made sense.

“Okay, let’s do it.”

They got to work. Whizzer punched out the components of the cardstock in his menu as Marvin deconstructed part of his partially assembled car.

“Hey, Whiz.”

Whizzer looked up from the sticker he was currently peeling, his hair flopping down onto his face.

“Yeah?”

“What was the name of that girl you ran into in the administrative building on our first day?” Mendel asked. He was seemingly in the middle of telling a story to all three of the girls.

“Claire.”

“Ahh, Claire, riiiiiight!” Mendel exclaimed triumphantly. “So we were wandering around, clueless, had no idea what was going on, and then Whizzer slams right into this girl, who’s holding some cup of coffee. The cup just explodes-EVERYWHERE, all over his shirt. And this girl, flips the fuck out. She starts screaming, and Whizzer and I are just standing there like, not knowing what the hell to do, and I see, like, the heartbreak in Whizzer’s eyes, ‘cause there’s a coffee stain on his white shirt, and now everyone in the building is looking at us to see what the hell was going on.”

Whizzer smirked, recalling the memory. The entire table was infatuated with Mendel’s story.

“Then this guy comes up behind her, I’m assuming her boyfriend, and he’s like ‘Claire, hey wassup,’ and it’s like she flips a switch. She’s like ‘oh no, I accidently spilled my coffee, totally my fault, my bad,’ and she turns into this little saint. And then they just, leave.”

Charlotte chuckled, “so what did you guys do?”

“Well, Whizzer just starts stripping in the middle of the administrative building, and then we walked back to our dorm and I had to carry his coffee-stained shirt down to the laundry room.”

“Did you ever get the stain out?” Trina asked, because those were the kinds of things she was concerned about.

“Not even close,” Whizzer interjected, “again, this was our first day of uni, so we had no clue what was going on. We dumped, like, a litre of laundry detergent in the thing, mixed with bleach and fabric softener. It was a disaster; we almost broke the washing machine.”

Charlotte laughed. “You should see Marvin try to do laundry, it’s like the guy’s never seen a dryer before.”

 

“Hey!” Marvin defended, “it’s not that bad.”

Marvin’s eyes met with Whizzer’s, who was smirking and giving him a knowing look. The girls continued to talk, ensuring Mendel and Cordelia that yes, it was that bad. Luckily, the waitress arrived, saving Marvin from having to talk about laundry anymore. She set down six grilled cheese sandwiches and three bowls of tomato soup.

Whizzer immediately took Marvin’s plate away from him and fit it into the limousine along with the bowl of soup and the other plate. The cardstock car was essentially useless, but the fact that they had built it and fit everything into it just made it special. It was a tiny victory, but both boys were prideful.

Marvin picked up his sandwich, prepared to dip it into the soup, when he was stopped by Whizzer.

“Woah, what the hell, you can’t just dump the whole sandwich in there, are you crazy?”

“Bold of you to assume I have any sanity.”

Whizzer rolled his eyes and proceeded to criticize Marvin. “Only idiots and elephants eat like that.”

“Are you calling me fat?”

“I’m calling you stupid.”

“Dick.”

“Moron.”

Whizzer pulled the knife out of his napkin and reached over the soup to cut up Marvin’s sandwich. He sliced it into four triangles, just like he had done with his own sandwich.

“There,” he declared, “at least now it isn’t gonna be painful for me to watch you eat, Dumbo.”

Marvin scoffed at the name, but proceeded to eat the triangular sandwich segments after dipping them in the tomato soup.

He turned his head suddenly as he heard giggles. Charlotte and Cordelia were in the corner of the booth, sitting rather close to one another. Charlotte had gotten some crumbs on her nose, and Cordelia was taking a considerably long time to clean them off for her. Marvin looked to Whizzer, who was also eyeing up the Charlotte and Cordelia situation. God, the two were such a cute couple.

“Oops.”

Marvin looked across the table to Mendel, who had somehow managed to spill his and Trina’s entire bowl of soup down the front of his sweater. Trina jumped forward with napkins in hand.

Whizzer gave him an exasperated sigh. “Jesus Christ, Mendel.”

Marvin snatched his napkin out from under his cutlery and handed it over to Trina, who took it and added it to the pile already covering both Mendel and the table.

“Mendel, how did you even manage to spill the ENTIRE thing of soup?” Marvin questioned, pulling more napkins out of the dispenser and giving them to Trina and Cordelia as they patted down Mendel.

“I’m not even disappointed,” Whizzer said, “I should have expected this.”

No matter how many napkins they plastered to Mendel, all that remained was large, red stain.

“Ugh, this is my fourth favourite sweater,” Mendel groaned in defeat.

“Whelp,” Cordelia sighed, “an exciting end to a fantastic evening.”

Mendel stood up and climbed over Whizzer to get out of the booth in an attempt to escape sitting in a pool of tomato soup. Now that he was standing, Marvin could see that the soup stain extended down to his pants. He had no idea how Mendel had managed to manhandle the soup in such a way that resulted in this.

The waitress, sensing that the night was almost over, dropped of the bill. Charlotte immediately snatched it up and did some quick math in her head.

“Okayyyy…everyone put in, like…ten bucks, and we should be good.”

Marvin did as he was told, then slid out of the booth so everyone else could get out. Whizzer did the same, shoving his hands in his pockets and hovering near Mendel.

“Well,” Trina said, sporting an optimistic smile that was all teeth, “this was fun.”

Whizzer snorted, “yeah, you having fun Mendel?”

Mendel sent a glare in Whizzer’s direction, his smile returning when he looked back to his girlfriend.

“Aight,” Whizzer said, spinning his car keys around his finger, “we should get going.”

The party of six began the short trek out to the parking lot, where the vehicles just so happened to be parked right next to one another. Everyone said their goodbyes as they clambered inside their respective cars. Marvin was one foot already through the door when Whizzer spoke up.

“Marv.”

Marvin looked up, slightly taken off guard when Whizzer spoke to him.

“See you tomorrow.”

Marvin narrowed his eyes, hoping no one in Whizzer’s car had heard him. Whizzer definitely knew this, which was why he escaped into the safety of his car to prevent Marvin from saying anything back, not before sending him a sly wink, of course.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will i ever finish this work? The world may never know.


	8. Brownies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one with Cordelia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw Dear Evan Hansen and Come From Away this weekend.
> 
> Not on Broadway, but just as good.

Marvin fumbled around the side of his bed in a scramble to find his phone. This was a lot harder than it normally would have been, since Marvin was currently perched in between Whizzer’s legs.  
Yeah, so the “this had better come to a stop” thing hadn’t exactly stuck, but they were still keeping it a secret.

“Ugh, just leave it,” Whizzer whined, resting his head back against the pillow.

Marvin ignored him, finally retrieving his phone from his pants, which were lying on the floor. It was an unfamiliar number, but it had the NYC area code, so he figured he should probably answer it.

“Hello?” he said, with Whizzer still under him.

_“Hey! This is Marvin, right?”_

“…Yes?”

_“It’s Cordelia, Mendel’s friend!”_

“Oh, Cordelia, hey.”

That caused Whizzer to perk up. He leaned forward, propping himself up on his elbows.

_“Are you busy right now?”_

Marvin looked down at Whizzer. “No, I’m doing nothing.”

Whizzer glared, because Marvin was doing _him_.

_“Do you think you could come meet me right now?”_

“Now? Is something wrong?”

_“No, no, no, nothing’s wrong. I just wanna…chat, I guess?”_

“Uh…okay, yeah, sure.”

_“Okay, you know the courtyard in between the administration building and the dining hall?”_

“Yeah.”

_“There’s this bench under a big maple tree, meet me there in five.”_

“Alright, see you then.”

_“See ya.”_

Marvin set his phone on the windowsill, then climbed out from under the covers.

“Where the hell are you going?” Whizzer asked, clearly bothered that Marvin was just ditching him after receiving a call from his best friend.

“Cordelia called me.”

“Yeah, I gathered. So…what? You’re just gonna leave?”

Marvin shrugged. “She said she wanted to talk to me.”

He sifted through the piles of stuff on the floor to find some decent clothes to put on. Whizzer sat up, wrapping Marvin’s blanket around himself like a cocoon. That was one of the many peculiar things Whizzer did. He adopted every place as if it were his own couch. Park benches, classrooms, cars, he curled up like a kitten.

“Why would she want to talk to you?”

“I don’t know, maybe she wanted to talk to someone who isn’t a total narcissist.”

“Hey! Mendel isn’t a narcissist.”

Marvin scoffed, but smiled. He pulled on a university hoodie along with a pair of sweats, electing to search the room for a sign of any pair of shoes, anywhere.

“Look, I don’t know what she wants, maybe she just wants to hang.”

“I think it’s safe to say that no one wants to ‘hang’ with you.”

“You’re ‘hanging’ with me right now.”

“Yeah, with ulterior motives. Anyways, I think she’s probably gonna talk to you about Charlotte.”

“Charlotte? Why? Why me?”

“Because you’re her best friend, and you’re not as connected to the dynamic as Trina.”

“Not conne-hey, I am totally connected.”

“Chill, besides, you have somewhere to be.”

Marvin rolled his eyes, chucking a pillow at Whizzer’s face in response, extracting a light chuckle from the other boy. That stupid, enchanting laugh.

_______________________

“Marvin! Hey! Over here!”

Marvin spotted a blond head of hair sitting on a bench under the maple tree, just where Cordelia said she’d be. He made his way over, zipping up his sweater right up to his chin and shoving his hands in his pockets. The weather was getting colder as they grew further into the first week of November. He gave her a simple wave as he sat on the bench with her. Part of Marvin wished that she chose an indoor location, but the other part knew that it wasn’t that cold, and he should just suck it up.

“Hey, Cordelia. What’d you wanna talk to me about?”

Cordelia was wearing a hoodie and a large knitted scarf, she looked cozy. She was clutching her bright yellow backpack against her chest, resting her chin against the canvas of the bag.

“Oh, ya know, I just wanted to chat.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow, unconvinced, but played along anyways.

“So…what’re you majoring in?”

Cordelia smiled, glad that Marvin had brought up some sort of subject. 

“Culinary arts, I want to be a baker. Actually…”

She unzipped her backpack and rummaged around in it for a quick moment before pulling out a small, blue, tupperware. She pressed it into Marvin’s hands.

“Brownies,” she said with a grin.

Marvin looked down at the container now is his grasp. He never really liked brownies, but he didn’t want to be rude. He peeled open the lid and popped a brownie into his mouth.

“Holy shit,” he said, “this is really good.”

She beamed at him, then grabbed a brownie for herself and took a bite.

“Thanks,” she replied, “I can’t cook for shit, but baking is my jam.”

Marvin blinked, remembering that first night when he met Whizzer in the library. When he referred to lab reports as his “jam.” Maybe he got it from Cordelia, since it sounded more natural coming from her.

“It really is.”

“So, what’s your major?”

“Physics.”

She perked up at that. “Hey, Whizzer’s a physics major! Do you guys have any classes together?”

Uh oh, this was where Marvin would begin to panic. He couldn’t do improv, he couldn’t do social situations in general, which was why his face had flushed.

“I…don’t know,” he answered after a moment. However, that moment felt like several minutes of silence in his head.

“Huh,” she replied, seemingly not noticing how red Marvin’s face was, “well, you two seem to be friendly.”

Double uh oh, double panic. No, triple panic. No, all the panics, all the panics because Marvin was panicking the hell out of this sitch.

“What? Why would you-why would you say that?” he asked, not suspiciously at all.

“I mean, you guys were chatting at the diner and stuff, it’s good to see you’re getting along.”

“Oh, yeah, right.” Nice. Cover = not blown.

“Speaking of the diner…you’re like, good friends with Charlotte, right?”

Ah, yup, there we go. Just like that, Whizzer was right. Marvin really couldn’t blame Cordelia though, she was desperate for information. It was almost amazing how Whizzer was able to predict Cordelia’s intentions without even hearing the phone call. 

“I am,” he said, truthfully.

“Huh, okay, okay, that’s cool that’s cool.”

“I mean, you guys seem to be hanging out a lot.”

Marvin was attempting to shift this conversation in her favour, but he had never been a smooth talker either.

“Yeah?” she asked, inviting Marvin to elaborate.

“Well, I saw you guys talking at the diner, and you seem to go together really well. Charlotte talks about you all the time.”

“She does? Really?”

“Yeah, and from what Whizzer tells me, you talk about her a lot too.”

“Whizzer told you that?”

Oh shit, he should not have said that. Why would Whizzer tell him that? If they had just met at the diner, why would he have told Marvin that?

“…Yes.”

She grinned, not seeming to acknowledge the in-depth principals of what Marvin had actually said.

“And Charlotte talks about me?”

Marvin sighed, he was getting a little tired of tip-toing around the subject.

“Look, Cordelia, I don’t really know you that well, but you seem nice enough-”

“Thanks?”

“-but I also see that you and Charlotte are falling head-over-heels for one another, and I for one, think we’ve all gotta stop dancing around this. Ask. Her. Out.”

Cordelia blinked, surprised by Marvin’s bluntness. It was a skill he had picked up from Whizzer.

“It’s not that easy,” she said, stumbling through the sentence. “Life isn’t like a romance novel, I don’t just run into someone in the library and we fall in love and get married. I’m not even sure that she really likes me back.”

“So you’re admitting you like her?”

Cordelia blushed. “Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cordelia is a great baker and you can quote me on that


	9. Elevators

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Marvin uses and elevator

This was killing him. 

It wasn’t enough for Marvin to stuck in this library late in the evening studying, when he should be watching movies with Trina, but now he couldn’t even reach the one book he needed on the shelf that shouldn’t have been built so high in the first place.

It wasn’t that late, it was only eight at night. But it was eight at night and he was spending his time in the library. Why, you may ask, did he choose to work in the library rather than the comfort of his own dorm? He preferred to be around people. He didn’t actually like interacting with said people, but he preferred being alone while in public than alone in a small room.

Still, he was missing out on a movie night with Trina. She had just got a DVD for Emperor’s New Groove and Marvin was dying to see it. Charlotte couldn’t attend either, as she had a certain date with a certain someone. That’s right, Marvin did it, he was basically cupid. Whizzer had argued otherwise, stating that he’s the one that figured out what Cordelia was up to in the first place.

For now, the main task on Marvin’s mind was this book. Green spine, thick, hardcover. It was taunting him, looking down on him as if it were better than him. Why were the shelves in this library so high? And if they were so high then why weren’t there even ladders, or even a step stool?

Marvin found himself up on his tip-toes, not even coming close to the base of the spine. Suddenly, a hand appeared from behind him and plucked the book from the shelf in one fell swoop. Marvin spun around to see who his tall saviour was, but he probably should have been able to guess. 

“It’s always you, isn’t it?” Marvin said, snatching the book from Whizzer’s hands.

“Hey,” Whizzer said innocently, holding his hands up in surrender, “I’m only trying to help.”

Marvin rolled his eyes and began to walk through the stacks of bookshelves, retreating to the table that had all his work laid out on it. Whizzer jogged for a moment in order to catch up to him.

“You working on Sonnabend’s class?”

“Aren’t I always?”

“You know, that’s actually what I came down here to work on.”

“Wow, what a spectacular coincidence,” Marvin deadpanned.

Whizzer smiled to himself, knowing that Marvin wasn’t actually annoyed that he was there, even if that’s what he was pretending. They reached Marvin’s table, and he sat in his spot to resume the work he was doing. Whizzer leaned against the table, tapping his finger against the weird, plastic-y material they were made of.

“You know, we could head back to your place and work on it together.”

Marvin looked up, giving Whizzer the most exhausted and “over it” looks he had ever seen.

“A generous offer, really, but I have to get this done.”

“That’s what I’m saying, we could go work on it together in a place that doesn’t smell like soup.”

“I know that’s what you’re saying, but it’s not what you mean.”

“How do you know what I mean?”

“Are you saying that you want to go to my dorm, and just study, without any ulterior motives?”

“That’s what I’m saying.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow, unconvinced. But, for some reason, he decided to give Whizzer the benefit of the doubt.

“Fine. We’ll go to my place.”

__________________________

“Please kill me. Just…just end my pain, end my suffering.”

Marvin slammed his head against his wooden desk, reminiscent of the first day at the library when he and Whizzer met.

Whizzer looked up from his paper. He was sitting in Marvin’s bed, curled up under the blankets again, busy completing a graph. It turns out that Whizzer really did just want to study.

“I would, but strangling takes too much energy and there aren’t any knives nearby.”

Marvin brought his head back up in order to look at Whizzer. The blanket was up around his head, he looked like a pillow Jedi.

Marvin sighed. “What time is it?”

Whizzer checked his phone. “Eleven.”

Marvin slumped down in his chair and sighed again, this time far louder and far more dramatic. 

“I don’t think I can bring myself to even look at another math problem tonight. I’m tapping out.”

He dropped his pencil onto the desk, only for it to roll off and land on the floor with an unsatisfying “clink.”

“Wanna watch a movie?” Whizzer asked, out of the blue.

Marvin blinked. That was an unlikely proposition from Whizzer. Because that’s not what their relationship was. They studied, and they screwed, and they didn’t watch movies together.

“It’s eleven, if we watch a movie it’ll be past midnight by the time we go to sleep. We have a morning class tomorrow.”

“Are you tired enough to fall asleep right now?” Whizzer retorted.

Huh, that was actually a pretty good point. Marvin knew if he tried to go to sleep he would just lie there for hours, tossing and turning. Marvin pushed up his glasses, yeah, he was wearing his glasses, and got up from his chair. Whizzer was still the only one at this school who had seen him in his glasses, not even Charlotte or Trina had seen him with them on. He pulled a curl of hair away from his forehead, his hair was always getting caught in the fold-y part of the glasses. It was annoying and he hated them.

Whizzer scooted over in the bed, making room for Marvin. He pulled his computer onto his lap and opened up Netflix. Marvin climbed in his bed and sat propped up against a pillow next to Whizzer, being certain that he wasn’t sitting too close.

“What’ll it be?” Whizzer asked, scrolling through the movie selection.

“What about Life, that one with Ryan Reynolds where they’re in space-”

“Uh uh, no,” Whizzer interjected, “space is scary, it’s dark, and it’s gonna kill us all.”

“Fine. What about Loving Vincent, that’s all oil painted about Vincent Van-“

“Nope. Animated movies are stupid.”

“It’s a cinematic masterpiece.”

“Still dumb.”

Marvin sighed, starting to grow frustrated. “How bout Back to the Future?”

Whizzer shook his head. “Naw, I don’t wanna watch a movie about a guy who tries to fuck his mom.”

Marvin gave an exasperated sigh. “Why would you ask me what to watch if you’re just gonna shoot down all my suggestions?”

“Let’s watch Coraline,” Whizzer said, completely ignoring Marvin’s question.

“Coraline is animated.”

“But it’s Coraline, it gets a pass.”

“What? And give me nightmares for years to come? The first time I watched that, I had nightmares about the Other Mother crawling through the wall and murdering me!”

“Awww,” Whizzer teased, “you can hold my hand if you get scared.”

Marvin rolled his eyes, pulling part of the blanket that Whizzer was enveloped in and wrapping it around himself. He pushed his glasses back up his face, they were always slipping down.

“Your glasses look good on you, you should wear them more often,” Whizzer said, seemingly out of nowhere.

Marvin looked at him, waiting for an insult to follow. But it never did.

“Oh, um, I don’t really like them, they’re kinda clunky.”

Whizzer shrugged, returning his attention back to the laptop. Marvin’s gazed lingered for a moment longer. Stupid Whizzer and his stupid opinions. His glasses were dumb, and he wasn’t gonna wear them any more than he had to.

He allowed himself to relax as they got further into the movie. He burrowed back into the pillow and rested his head on something to the right of him as he let himself fall asleep.

______________________________

Marvin woke up in bed with Whizzer.

The reason this was unusual was not because he and Whizzer were not dating, or even friends really, because Marvin had woken up in bed with Whizzer a few times before. The reason it was unusual was because this time, they were both fully clothed.

When Marvin woke up, Whizzer was poking him repeatedly in the stomach. He rolled over and groaned, all he wanted was a few more minutes.

“Marv, it’s 7:20.”

Marvin jumped up, cursing to himself internally. He had to be at Sonnabend’s class in ten minutes, as did Whizzer. Why Whizzer was so calm, Marvin didn’t know. He practically leaped out of bed and ran to the bathroom to brush his teeth and throw in some contacts.

“Why didn’t you wake me up sooner?” Marvin questioned, a toothbrush in his mouth.

“I couldn’t help it,” Whizzer replied, tying his own shoes, “you were so adorable snuggling into me.”

Marvin scowled. “I don’t snuggle.”

Whizzer shrugged, now standing and waiting by the door, which only stressed Marvin out more. He scooted out of the bathroom and to the windowsill to pick up his phone and backpack. There lay his glasses, which he didn’t remember taking off before he fell asleep. Marvin threw his bag over his shoulder and marched out the door, assuming Whizzer would follow him.

He checked his phone. Five minutes before their class started. Disregarding his safety completely, he practically flew down the stairs. Whizzer was close behind him, also running for his life. The two boys sprinted across campus and towards the engineering building. They received looks from several students as they zoomed by, Whizzer almost taking one down in a close call. By the time they reached the building, there were two minutes left.

Marvin bolted for the stairs, but was stopped by Whizzer.

“Woah, Marv, it’s five floors, the elevator is right here.”

He gestured to the elevator, which was open and empty. Marvin hestitated. He was pretty good at taking the stairs, maybe he could make it up before class started? But he was already tired from running across campus.

“Come on, Marv,” Whizzer urged.

Well, fuck it.

They hopped onto the elevator; Whizzer repeated hitting the fifth-floor button as the elevator doors closed. Marvin was so concentrated on regaining his breath that he almost he forgot he was in a six by six metal box. Key word, almost.

He watched the floor counter go up.

1,2.

Almost there, just a few more seconds.

3,4.

Marvin heard a whirring sound, then a few clicks. He looked at Whizzer. Was this normal? Were elevators supposed to do this? Whizzer’s eyebrows were furrowed together. Oh, God, elevators were not supposed to do this.

The lights flickered, and the elevator jolted to a stop.

Oh no, oh god no.

Marvin waited, hoping that some miracle would occur, and the elevator would start moving again, but it didn’t.

“Oh my god,” Marvin said, quiet at first.

Whizzer looked at him, his eyes beginning to go wide.

“Oh my god,” Marvin repeated, louder this time.

Whizzer reached forward and pressed the red panic button to alert maintenance that they were trapped. Trapped, because that’s what they were, and Whizzer was the one who convinced Marvin to get in the elevator. He very quickly realized why Marvin didn’t like taking the elevator.

“Motherfucker!” Marvin yelled, startling Whizzer. “The one time!” he shouted, “the one time in _years_ I take an elevator, and it _fucking breaks down?_ ”

Whizzer stood back, not saying anything. Marvin began breathing faster, and harder, his chest moving up and down much more quickly than it was supposed to. He was hyperventilating, in an elevator, that was stuck.

Marvin backed against the wall and sunk to the floor, tucking his knees to his chest. Whizzer didn’t do anything, what was he supposed to do? Okay, what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t just leave him there, but he didn’t want to overwhelm him.

Whizzer knelt down next to Marvin, hesitating before placing a hand on Marvin’s back. Whizzer had never been good at comforting people, but he knew he had to do something. He felt like this whole situation was kind of his fault. He rubbed his hand back and forth up and down Marvin’s back.

“It’s okay,” he said in a hushed tone, “you’re going to be okay.”

Instinctively, Marvin leaned into Whizzer’s side. He was shaking. Whizzer placed his other hand on the back of Marvin’s neck and ran his fingers through his curly hair. He knew that when he was overwhelmed, he liked it when people played with his hair. Maybe Marvin was the same.

For now, this was all Whizzer knew to do. For the next twenty minutes stuck inside that god forsaken elevator, the two boys sat there. Marvin’s breathing had regulated after a while, but neither of them moved. They stayed there, in each other’s arms.

_______________________

Marvin stumbled out of the elevator, breathing in the fresh air like it was cocaine.

Okay, maybe not the greatest example, but you get the idea.

Whizzer was right behind him, thanking the maintenance workers that got them out. Marvin was over this entire day, all he wanted was to go back to his dorm and collapse onto his bed. But no, he still had to go to class, and then another one after that.

Marvin approached the door to Sonnabend’s lecture hall, almost falling over when he moved to pull it open and it instead stayed put.

“It’s locked,” he said, partially to himself and partially to Whizzer, who was standing to his right.

Whizzer sighed. “It’s fine, Sonnabend’s a cool guy, he’ll understand if we tell him what happened.”

Marvin leaned against the wall next to the lecture hall, allowing himself to take a breather. He crossed his arms, both exhausted and embarrassed by this whole ordeal.

“Hey,” he said, catching Whizzer’s attention, “can we just, pretend that didn’t happen?”

Whizzer nodded, understanding that Marvin might not be the type to talk these things out. Part of Marvin was surprised that Whizzer didn’t try to tease him about it.

“Do you maybe wanna go get some coffee? Waste some time before our next class?” 

Marvin blinked. Coffee. With Whizzer. An odd request, to say the least, but he figured that this was just a sympathy coffee since Whizzer had just seen him have a panic attack in an elevator. Marvin mentally shrugged.

“Yeah, okay, sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes i'm tired


	10. Scars and Muffins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Mendel spills tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes

As Whizzer led Marvin into the same coffee shop that he usually went to with Charlotte and Trina, he was silently praying that the girls had already left. To Marvin’s joy, they had, to his dismay, someone else was there.

“Mendel!” Whizzer exclaimed, walking over to the table his roommate was already situated at, sipping on some kind of tea.

“Hey Whizzer…and Marvin?”

Marvin made a face that was part smile and part grimace.

“What’re you guys doing here?” Mendel asked, “Whiz, I thought you had class?”

Marvin took the seat next to Whizzer, feeling like he was third-wheeling. He wasn’t planning on interrupting the dynamic between Whizzer and Mendel here, he didn’t even know Mendel that well.

“Yeah,” Whizzer said, leaning back nonchalantly in his chair and stealing a chunk of Mendel’s croissant, “we got stuck in an elevator and missed class.”

Mendel raised his eyebrows, looking back and forth between the two boys. One of whom was his best friend, the other was his girlfriend’s best friend. Them ending up with one another…was an odd coincidence. But who was he to question it?

“You guys are in the same class?” he asked instead.

Marvin nodded, still electing to stay silent. Whizzer leaned forward, getting to his feet.

“Marv, what do you want?”

“Uh…black coffee.”

Whizzer cringed at the order, black coffee was for soulless monsters, but proceeded to walk up the counter to order anyway. Now, he left Marvin with Mendel. Mendel was a nice enough guy; he and Marvin just weren’t the most compatible of people.

“So,” Mendel began, taking a sip from his mug of tea, “how’ve you been?”

The question was a formality.

“Good,” Marvin replied. “Tired, you know, but good. How’ve your psych classes been?”

“Not so bad, except this one girl, Caroline.”

“Was that the girl who was sleeping with her boss?”

“Oh my god, yes!” Mendel exclaimed, his pent-up annoyance evident in his voice. “One of these classes is done by a younger professor and she wants to make it all modern and progressive, so she has us do these group and partner exercises so we can learn how to interact with each other, which is good and all, but I keep getting paired up with the same girl. She has no filter, I know too much about this girl’s sex life.”

“Oh god,” Marvin said in between laughs, “I don’t want to know.”

“No, you really don’t.”

“You talking about Caroline again?” Whizzer interjected, setting down a black coffee and banana muffin in front of Marvin.

Marvin didn’t ask for the banana muffin, but he also didn’t mind that Whizzer had gotten him one, not at all.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be done talking about that girl, she’s driving me up the goddamn walls.”

“Mend, if she’s throwing you off your rocker, you’re gonna have trouble as a psychiatrist.”

Marvin turned to Whizzer with furrowed eyebrows. “Off your rocker? Your jam? Why do you talk like you’re from the eighties?”

Whizzer made a face of total and utter betrayal, causing Mendel to laugh.

“He does do that!” Mendel chuckled, grinning ear to ear.

“Hey,” Whizzer defended, “I do not.”

“You definitely do,” Mendel confirmed, “you also call everything ‘groovy.’”

“I-” Whizzer began, about to defend himself, until he realized there was nothing to defend, “I actually do that a lot, yeah.”

“Fun story,” Marvin started, “I had a girl named Caroline in my second-grade class. Once at recess in winter, she pushed me off the top of the play structure where the fireman’s pole was, and since the ground was frozen, I hit the ground hard. Actually-” he pulled down his shirt off his left shoulder, exposing a long scar that extended from his shoulder blade to the top of his ribcage under his armpit. “-I got this from it, cut it on the cement divider.”

Mendel made a face. “Ouch, that looks like it hurt. Wait, how old were you?”

“Seven.”

“Yikes.”

“Hey, I’ve got one,” Whizzer proposed. He untucked his button-down from the waistband of his pants to show of a wishbone shaped scar to the right of his bellybutton. Marvin knew that scar, he had seen it many times before. “Got it from some loose fencing.”

“A fence? Lame,” Marvin said, trying to distract from the fact that Marvin new that Whizzer had many other scars in many other places.

“Actually, I had broken into my neighbour’s yard because he was an asshole and I was gonna steal his toolkit ‘cause it was cool and it had, like, and axe in it. Anyways, I had the kit in my arms and then he comes busting out his backdoor with a fucking rifle, To Kill a Mockingbird style, and I am outta there. I sprint and dive to the weak spot in the fence where I snuck in, and I scratch the shit out of my legs, and I slice open that chunk of my stomach.”

“Did you still get the toolkit?” Mendel asked.

“Hell yeah I did.”

Marvin shrugged, non-verbally admitting that Whizzer’s story was a lot cooler than he had initially assumed.

“Ope,” Mendel said, making the noise only Mendel and farmers made, “I should be heading down to my class.”

He stood up from his chair, knocking over his mug of tea in the process, all over the sleeves of his sweater.

Whizzer sighed, resting his head in his hands. “Jesus Christ, Mendel, we can’t take you anywhere.”

Marvin leaned forward, once again bombarding Mendel with a plethora of napkins from the dispenser. The guy was a mess.

“Why does this keep happening to me?” Mendel asked. To who, Marvin didn’t know. To Marvin? To Whizzer? To God? Whoever he was asking, they didn’t have an answer.

Marvin attempted to help pat down Mendel as Whizzer just watched, defeated.

“You know what, just leave it,” Mendel groaned, “it’s my shame stain.”

Mendel hoisted his backpack over his shoulder, which had some seventies flower power design, and proceeded to walk out the door of the café. The poor guy, Mendel couldn’t walk five feet without bumping into something. For a moment, Marvin was so absorbed in thought that he forgot there was still another person at his table that he should probably be making conversation with.

“So, how’s it hanging?”

Whizzer snorted. “How’s it hanging? Now who’s talking like an old person.”

“Hey, I’m just trying to make conversation.”

“Failing, failing to make conversation.”

Marvin frowned, and took another bite from his muffin. “Asshole,” he said, however it sounded more like “Asfnnfogle” since his mouth was filled with muffin.

Whizzer reached forward and snatched the muffin from Marvin’s hand, taking it and popping the rest of it into his mouth.

“Hey!”

“Whghat?” Whizzer replied, his mouth muffin-filled.

“You just ate my muffin.”

“Um, last time I checked, I bought that muffin.”

“Yeah, and you gave it to me.”

“So? I still have jurisdiction over it.”

“If you bought someone a gift and gave them legal ownership over it you couldn’t take it back because that would be stealing.”

“But I didn’t give you legal ownership, I simply allowed you to eat some of it.”

Marvin crossed his arms. “Fine, whatever.”

Whizzer smirked. “It’s okay, I know you love me,” he teased.

“I do not.”

“I know you do.”

“You’re a douchebag,” Marvin insisted.

“Yeah, a douchebag you love.”

Marvin rolled his eyes, standing up from the table.

“I should probably get back.”

“Get back where?”

Marvin shrugged. “I dunno, somewhere.”

Whizzer stood too, adjusting his messenger bag on his shoulder. “Let’s go to my dorm.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow.

“Mendel’s gonna be gone for like, and hour, besides, I have more blankets than you.”

Marvin shrugged, submitting to Whizzer’s request. Marvin didn’t know why he was allowing himself to spend this much time with Whizzer, they didn’t even like each other. But, in a way, it was easy. Charlotte and Trina had already started class by now, and there was no way Marvin would fall back asleep at this point, so he might as well do this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, comments are appreciated
> 
> i hope you pass your exams and live your best life


	11. Jason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one with the kid genius

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey you
> 
> yeah, you
> 
> you're gorgeous ;)

“I really have to go.”

“Come on, Marv,” Trina whined, “you used to leave at, like, 7:15, why’ve you been dipping earlier lately?”

“The building gets crowded around then,” he lied, “it’s just easier if I go now.”

He lied because the real reason he was leaving early was so he could talk to Whizzer before class. Not because he enjoyed talking to Whizzer, of course, but because they would review different assignments, that was all.

“Just, here, take this,” Charlotte said, pressing a granola bar into his palm, “breakfast is the most important meal of the day blah blah blah whatever goodbye.”

“Actually, fun fact, breakfast isn’t-” 

“I said byeeee-”

Trina giggled as Charlotte pushed Marvin out of the café, granola bar in tow.

Marvin began the walk to the engineering building; glad he had such good friends. The end of November was nearing, and at this point in the month, he had become all too familiar with the path. The leaves on the trees had turned various shades of yellow, orange, and red, many of which had fallen to the ground only to be raked into piles and thrown into plastic bags.

Marvin reached the outside of the building, quickly spotting a familiar head of hair, facing away from him. He approached Whizzer, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Whizzer, hey.”

The boy spun around. Yes, it was Whizzer, but something was different.

“What is that?”

Whizzer followed Marvin’s gaze, leading his line of sight to his left.

“That is a child.”

“Yeah, a child that has ears. And also, I’m not a child, I’m fifteen.”

Marvin blinked, slightly embarrassed that the kid had heard his comment and also surprised that he was talking to Marvin at all. To be frank, Marvin would’ve guessed he was closer to twelve than fifteen, he was small and scrawny, a know-it-all expression hidden under a mop of curly brown hair.

Whizzer looked between Marvin and the kid, amused. Marvin was giving him a look that said “please save me from this situation that I’ve got myself into.” Whizzer smirked, Marvin looked both confused and slightly scared. 

“This is Jason,” Whizzer said, standing proudly, “he’s some sorta kid genius. Takin’ some classes here and then also goes to high school. I got assigned to walk him around and whatever. He’s pretty legit.”

“He’s also standing right next to you,” Jason said, in an uncaring voice. For a high schooler in a university, this kid seemed pretty comfortable.

Whizzer threw an arm around Jason, resting it on his shoulder. “We’re bonding.”

“Right,” Marvin replied, gripping the strap of his backpack so tight his knuckles turned white. “Well, uh, I’m Marvin,” Marvin said to the kid, who didn’t seem too interested in what Marvin had to say at all.

Jason looked at Marvin, then he looked to Whizzer, who was looking at him with such pride he might as well be his son. “Is he your boyfriend?” Jason asked with such innocence and curiosity it was like his personality had done a complete 180.

“What? No!” Marvin replied, both flustered and defensive.

At the same time, Whizzer scoffed, “he wishes.”

Marvin turned to Whizzer, glaring at the other boy for not setting the record straight immediately to Jason. Whizzer still had a goofy grin on his face.

“We should get to class,” Marvin stated, eager to change the subject.

Jason gave Whizzer a knowing look, about what, Marvin was unsure.

“Aight,” Whizzer said, “Jason, follow your elders.”

The trio proceeded into the large building, heading over to the staircase. Marvin grabbed the handle of the heavy metal door and swung it open, holding it as Whizzer walked through. Jason stopped in the doorway.

“Why aren’t we taking the elevator?” Jason questioned.

“Exercise,” Whizzer lied, already halfway up the first flight. He stopped and turned to Marvin, flashing him a perfect smile. Marvin was grateful that Whizzer elected not to tell Jason about his (not so irrational) fear of elevators.

Jason sighed dramatically, “I don’t need exercise, I’m young, I bounce back. You guys are old.”

“You got me there,” Whizzer admitting, continuing his trek up the flights of stairs, “and because we’re old, you have to do what we say.”

Jason sighed dramatically, but proceeded to follow Whizzer up the stairway anyway. Marvin also began the ascent, quickly passing both of them by the third floor.

“What the fuck?” Whizzer wheezed, huffing and puffing. “How are you so fast?”

“Now who’s old?” Marvin giggled, waiting outside the door to the fifth floor.

Whizzer took off his shoe and chucked it at Marvin’s head.

“Hey! Uncalled for.”

“No, you deserved it,” Jason admitted, trailing half a floor behind Whizzer. 

“Fine,” Marvin said, taking off his backpack. He proceeded to do a series of moves similar to that of a mediocre cheerleader, “yay!” he cheered with mock enthusiasm. “Hey, hey, he’s our man, who can do it? Whizzer can!”

Whizzer tried to be annoyed, but instead enveloped into a cascade of laughter. Even Jason couldn’t help but chuckle. Whizzer quickly reached Marvin at the top of the stairs, and joined him in his cheers. 

“Woooo! Jason! Yeah! You got this! Andre De Grasse over here! Usain Bolt is weeping!” Whizzer yelled down the stairs to the panting teen.

Jason trudged up the final step to be bombarded by an uproarious applause from the two boys. “Not boyfriends my ass,” Jason grumbled, unheard by anyone other than himself.

Once he had finally gotten both Whizzer and Jason through the door, Marvin proceeded to walk into the lecture hall. He took his normal seat, then Whizzer sat to his right, followed by Jason. Marvin reached into his bag to pull out his laptop. Jason, on the other hand, pulled out a sparkly pink Lisa Frank scribbler and a mechanical pencil.

The kid must have noticed the curious stares he was receiving from the two university students, as he turned to them in order to explain himself.

“My little brother gave it to me,” he explained, “said it was his lucky scribbler, and he wanted me to have it for university.”

Whizzer smirked, both heart-warmed and amused. “Aw, he does have a soul.”

Jason glared at Whizzer for insinuating he cared about anyone other than himself. “Shut up.”

About halfway into class, Marvin started to get a little worried. He stared at his laptop, where he had few notes typed out. Other than a few lines about kinetic energy, he only had half a page. To his right, Whizzer was leaning against the table with his head propped up on his hand. His eyes were lifeless and glossed over, he had typed just about as much as Marvin. If anything, that had made   
Marvin feel more assured. However, when he looked past Whizzer, he saw Jason. Jason was writing frantically, filling up the entire page in writing so close together it might as well have been one word.

Marvin leaned to the side and gently tapped Whizzer on the shoulder.

“Should we be writing something?” he asked, gesturing to Jason with his head.

Whizzer craned his head to see what Jason was writing, then turned back to Marvin.

“He’s not writing anything important,” he reassured, “it’s just pi.”

Marvin cocked an eyebrow. “Pi? He took up the whole page.”

“Yup.”

________________________

“So, Jace, how were your first university classes?” Whizzer asked, clamping a firm hand over Jason’s shoulder.

“Jace, really?” he replied, seemingly uncaring.

Whizzer was about to reply, probably in defense of his amazing nickname for his new adolescent friend, but was distracted by the buzzing of his cell phone. He pulled it out of the front pocket of his messenger bag and quickly scrolled through it.

The trio was on their way to the west parking lot. Jason went to two classes at the university twice a week. Whizzer happened to be in both of those classes, which was why he was assigned to take Jason place to place. Coincidentally, Marvin was in both of those classes as well.

“Marv,” Whizzer said as he rapidly typed on his phone.

“What?”

“Mendel says we’re going out for fireworks for Thanksgiving.”

“Thanksgiving fireworks? That’s not even a thing.”

Whizzer shrugged. “The three of us went to see them last year, it’ll be lots of fun with more people. Mendel borrows this pickup truck from his aunt, and we fill it up with blankets and stuff and drive out to a field and sit in the back and just watch ‘em. It’s awesome. He said he’s gonna invite you, Trina, and Charlotte.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow. “Wow, sitting in a cold field and watching things explode in the sky, sure sounds like fun,” he said sarcastically.

“You’re going, I’ve declared it.” Suddenly Whizzer perked up, like a lightbulb had gone off in his brain. “Hey, Jason.”

“Hm?” said the boy, only half paying attention as he was playing some game on his phone.

“What are you doing for thanksgiving?”

Marvin looked at Whizzer, wondering what exactly he was up to.

“Uh, I don’t know really,” Jason said nonchalantly. “I don’t really want to go to the family dinner this year, it’s gonna be weird. My dad cheated on my mom with a man and then when they got   
divorced my mom married my dad’s psychiatrist who was also mine and her psychiatrist, and now we’re all supposed to be eating together. So, I don’t know if I really want to be stuck in the middle of all that.”

Marvin blinked. “Wow.”

“Yeah,” Jason agreed, still staring at his phone. It looked like he was playing electronic chess against somebody from Latvia.

“Well,” Whizzer began, “would you like to join some university students to sit in a field and watch fireworks as we eat pizza instead?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to the peeps who gave suggestions about how to fit in Jason. I really wanted his in the story since he's probably my favourite character to write for, as he has an outside perspective from everyone.


	12. Fleece and Quilts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where someone finds out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted May 27th (at eight)

“Okay, so the blue on is fleece and warm and stuff, but it’s also a little small. The red on is a quilt, and it’s bigger so we can make it fit more people, but I’m worried it’ll be too cold.”

Marvin examined the two blankets Trina was holding up. They were standing in the middle of a department store; Trina had decided that they needed to get supplies for Thanksgiving. Marvin still wasn’t completely on board with eh whole “Thanksgiving fireworks” thing. Who was even doing the fireworks? That wasn’t even a thing, this wasn’t Independence Day. Trina, on the other had, was living for it.

“Get a few of the fleece ones, Charlotte already has a bunch of quilts anyways.”

“Good, that’s what I was thinking.”

Trina scooped up a bundle of blankets and dumped them into Marvin’s arms.

“Alright. Now, snacks.”

Marvin trudged behind her as her own personal Sherpa. She continued to load an assortment of items into his arms, goldfish, granola bars, gummy bears, chocolate. The walls of the store were bright green, yellow lettering, designating sections like produce and pharmacy. The bright lights of the building bore into Marvin’s eyes like daggers, light daggers. Okay, Marvin wasn’t great at similes, but the point was that he needed to sneeze. However, he couldn’t sneeze, because he was holding a camel’s worth of food and blankets.

“Mendel said when they did this last year, Whizzer fell out of the truck bed last time and landed in a puddle.”

“Alright,” replied Marvin as he scanned the shelf for hot chocolate mix, “note, make sure Whizzer sits in the middle.”

Trina took a bag of pretzels off the shelf and turned it in her hands as she read the ingredient list. “What do you think of Whizzer?”

Marvin blinked, desperately hoping she wasn’t leading towards something else. “I think he seems…friendly.”

“He has an interesting sense of fashion, huh?”

Marvin smiled to himself, remembering that one time after they hooked up when Whizzer went through his closet and insulted every piece of clothing Marvin owned. Whizzer was judgemental and annoying, yes, but style was one thing Whizzer knew well.

“I guess you could say that.”

“I don’t really know him that well,” Trina said, placing the bag into Marvin’s arms atop all the other items, “but you guys seemed to get along.”

Why was everyone saying that? It was like everyone secretly had a plan to make Marvin nervous by bringing up Whizzer. As far as everyone else knew, he and Whizzer had only met once. Besides, they barely even talked at the diner.

“I mean, we’ve only talked a little bit,” he lied, as if they hadn’t known each other for over a month. Not only that, they were sleeping together as well.

“Mendel and Cordelia talk very highly of him,” she said, as if she were racking her brain. “I had only met him once before we all got together at the diner, I was worried that the whole thing was gonna seem awkward.”

“Well, I think it went well.”

“Me too. I mean, we all kinda paired off in our conversations and stuff, so it was good you had someone to talk to.”

“Yeah.”

“Look, Marvin,” she said, suddenly turning serious as she faced him head on. “Charlotte told me he’s gay.”

Marvin blinked. Oh, wow, not at all where he thought this was going. Did she know? Did he do something to tip her off? Is she gonna be mad? Normally someone would tell their best friends if they were hooking up with someone for the past month, that’s just what you’re supposed to do. Especially if it was a guy, and your best friends had no idea you were even gay.

“Trina, I-”

“I’m just concerned,” she interjected. “Because I saw you two at that diner, and he was making eyes, and I don’t want you to lead him on or something. We’re probably gonna be spending more time together and I don’t want him getting the wrong idea.”

Double oh. This was definitely an unexpected turn of events. Marvin didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

“Oh, uh…you don’t-you don’t have to worry about-”

“I know, I was just-”

“-Yeah, it’s, it’s okay.”

“-Right.”

Marvin chuckled under his breath. “You think Whizzer was hitting on me?”

Trina laughed too, but still remained defensive. “Hey, his eyes lit up like a match when you guys were building that dumb car, you can’t blame me for thinking he might have a thing for you.”

Marvin shook his head, still smiling. Whizzer was just playing it low-key, that was how Whizzer normally acted anyways. He was flirty, it was like that time when they went out for pizza in between classes and Whizzer charmed his way to a free 2 liter of pop. Obviously, the only reason they went out for pizza was because Marvin had a coupon that was about to expire and no one else was available. Whizzer still annoyed the shit out of him, this was merely a matter of business.

______________________

Marvin nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt Whizzer’s breath on the back of his neck.

“Let’s go to my place,” he whispered, Marvin could feel the heat of his breath, creeping up his skin like a breeze. He jumped a foot in the air.

“What the fuck?” he mustered, spinning around to see Whizzer grinning back at him, seemingly satisfied with scaring the boy.

Marvin had just finished his last class of the day, a class he didn’t have with Whizzer. His plan was to return to his dorm and finish up some of the many assignments he was only half finished.   
Apparently that plan might be changing.

“Let’s go to my place,” the taller boy repeated. “Mendel’s just left for some date with Trina so my dorm is free.”

“I can’t,” Marvin protested, “I have…homework.”

Whizzer rolled his eyes. “Come on, Marv, it’ll be fast. You can do your ‘homework’ later.

Marvin sighed. “Fine, but it better be quick, I have graphs to make.”

“Don’t worry honey, you can get back to your arts and crafts real soon.”

“You’re a prick.”

“Maybe, a prick who wants to hurry up and sleep with you.”

Marvin held out a hand, gesturing for Whizzer to lead the way. What began as a leisurely walk quickly transformed into an aggressive speed-shuffle as they made their way towards the dorms, up the stairs, and through the halls.

Whizzer fumbled with his key once they finally reached the door to his and Mendel’s dorm room. The two staggered into the room, Marvin barely managing to kick the door closed as he was already caught in a tangle of shirts falling onto the floor. Whizzer fell back onto his bed and Marvin crawled on top of him, moving to kiss down his jaw and onto his neck.

It had been a while since this had happened between them, Marvin quickly remembered why he liked it so much. Whizzer’s bed was very different from his own, there were so many blankets that it was like he was having sex on a fucking marshmallow. Not bad, just weird. He honestly didn’t know how Whizzer slept in this bed every night, there was more blanket than mattress.

Just as Marvin was letting his hands drift down to Whizzer’s waist, the other boy suddenly sat up. Marvin leaned back and cocked an eyebrow, why the hell was Whizzer pulling back? He was the one who had suggested this in the first place.

Whizzer was looking past Marvin’s shoulder, his eyes wide. Marvin turned his head to follow his gaze, right to the back corner of the room, where Mendel was standing.

Mendel, the poor soul. Mendel, who had probably just forgotten his phone charger and popped back into his dorm to grab it before his date with his girlfriend. Mendel, who watched as his best friend/roommate walked into their dorm making out with his girlfriend’s best friend who, to Mendel’s knowledge, barely even knew Whizzer. Poor, poor Mendel.

His face had gone pale, his arms were half raised against his chest, frozen in space. Marvin stared back, mouth half open, at a complete loss for words. There went their cover, their cover was blown. No, it wasn’t just blown, it was completely out the window, flown into another country. There was no excuse for this, no story they could make up to pretend this was all some misunderstanding.

Whizzer sprang up, marching over to Mendel and raising a firm finger to his lips.

“You saw nothing,” he said in a tone that struck fear into Marvin’s heart, he could only imagine how it made Mendel feel. “This never happened, totally erased from your mind.”

As Whizzer berated the soft and sweet Mendel into submission, Marvin elected to stay silent. He reached onto the floor to pick up his shirt and quietly slipped it on. Of all the things to go wrong today, of course Marvin’s best friend’s boyfriend would find out about the hookups Marvin had been having with his best friend’s boyfriend’s roommate. The whole situation was a very tangled web, and part of Marvin just wanted to cut the strings.

“I should go,” Marvin said, quietly. Mendel looked at him with wide eyes, both traumatized from what he just saw, and scared of Whizzer’s wrath.

“Yeah, okay,” Whizzer said, not looking away from Mendel, “I’ll see you in class, Marv.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't planning on posting again so soon, but c'mon, it's Trina and Mendel's anniversary!!!! also the day Trina dies i guess


	13. Perry the Platypus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Mendel and Whizzer talk it out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note, I take little time to edit these so I'm sorry if they're filled with grammar or spelling errors. Feel free to point anything out.

Whizzer didn’t get flustered. He had a way with words, he was good at keeping cool and smooth in awkward situations, or at least at keeping the illusion that he was comfortable. That’s why it was so weird that he was lacking the ability to make words come out of his mouth at that moment.

It was the evening of that day; the day Mendel had caught them. Whizzer had hesitantly sent Mendel on his way for his date with Trina, only hoping and praying that he wouldn’t let the cat out of the bag.

Whizzer was sitting on his bed with his back against the wall and computer open on his lap when Mendel finally returned. He tossed his lanyard onto his desk and dropped onto his bed with a sigh.

“Care to explain this?” Mendel asked, defeated. “Because I just sat through an entire dinner with Trina trying not to blurt out the fact that you’re sleeping with Marvin.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow. “Is who I sleep with a normal topic on your dates?”

Mendel narrowed his eyes. “Don’t try to be cute about this.”

“I can’t help it, I’m cute about everything.”

Mendel kicked off his shoes and stole one of the several blankets from Whizzer’s bed to wrap around himself. “What’s the deal? Why the hell are you sleeping with him? How the hell? You’ve only met twice.”

“Weeeeeeell,” Whizzer dragged, “I actually met him in September.”

“September, seriously?”

“I ran into him in a library, then it turned out we had a bunch of classes together, and then one day we were alone in the laundry room and we kind of hooked up.”

“But it was just the one time, right?”

“Weeeeeeell-”

“Jesus Christ, Whizzer,” Mendel sighed, rubbing his hands over his face.

“In my defense, I didn’t even know he knew Trina and Charlotte. And then he was there at the diner, and it was a whole thing. Marv said he didn’t want to tell anyone about it since he didn’t want to fuck things up between Charlotte and Delia, which kinda made sense.”

“But they’re basically girlfriends already, why don’t you just say something?”

Whizzer shrugged. “It’s nothing serious, we’re not dating or anything. There’s nothing to say.”

“Right.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Mendel hugged the blanket around himself a little tighter. It was dark outside, the only thing lighting their small dorm was the light from Whizzer’s laptop and a candle in the windowsill. They weren’t technically allowed to have candles in the dorms, but Whizzer lit them anyway. This one was called “chunky sweater” and smelled like the holidays. Mendel argued it was far too early for holiday smells, but that didn’t stop Whizzer.

“I mean, Whizzer, I’ve been your roommate for over a year, and I don’t think you’ve ever slept with the same guy more than once.”

“Hey, that’s not true, what about that one guy from Subway?”

“Fine, more than twice.”

Whizzer shrugged in defeat.

“It’s literally nothing,” Whizzer insisted, unnecessarily using the word literally. “But for real, you can’t say anything about this, Marvin doesn’t want anyone to know. As far as everyone else knows, we’re just acquaintances.”

“No, Whizzer,” Mendel warned, “you know I can’t keep secrets, this is only gonna end in disaster.”

“You have to, Mend, because we aren’t even a thing, it’s just sex.”

“Please, spare me the details,” Mendel said, scrunching up his face. “I can’t believe you’re sleeping with my girlfriend’s best friend. I didn’t even know he was gay. Actually, that explains a lot.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t?”

Mendel shook his head.

Huh. Suddenly, things were beginning to make a little more sense. This would explain why Marvin wanted to keep this whole thing under wraps. Sure, the Charlotte and Cordelia thing made sense, but it also made sense if there was more to it. Maybe Charlotte and Trina didn’t even know Marvin was gay. This while situation was becoming a lot deeper and more complex than Whizzer had ever wanted. Maybe it would just be in his best interest to take a step back from it all and leave Marvin to figure out his own complicated life.

Whizzer never did what was in his best interest, though, did he?

“It’s whatever though,” Whizzer said, “we’re not even friends, the guy’s kind of a douche.”

“Hm,” was all Mendel replied.

“What?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Yeah, but you went ‘hm’ which is Mendel for ‘sure, Jan.’”

“You keep saying you don’t actually like the guy, but I remember seeing you two in the coffee shop, and you seemed pretty friendly there.”

“That was just a professionally courtesy, and we were around you and stuff. We were just pretending.”

“Okay.”

“Stop, stop doing that thing where you’re saying you agree with me but everything in your tone of voice tells me otherwise. Marvin and I are not friends, we’re like…like in superhero movies where the hero and the villain are playful enemies. Like, like Dr. Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus. We’re like that.”

“Okay, but like 99.9% of the time in those movies the hero and villain end up falling in love or something, or at the very least everyone ships them and writes fanfic about them. It’s undeniable and you know it.”

“No, I don’t know it, because that’s not something that happens. No one ships Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus.”

“You should know better than anyone that there are probably people out there that do.”

“Whatever, the point is, we’re keeping this on the down-low, and if you tell anyone, I’ll break you.”

“But for how long?” Mendel whined. “I’m like a time bomb, I can’t keep secrets. Besides, how long are you gonna keep this up? Cause we have that Thanksgiving thing right after exams and I don’t think I can survive being around that many people that don’t know a secret that I know for that long.”

“Right,” Whizzer thought for a moment, “maybe we shouldn’t do that.”

“What? Noooo, we have to, Cordelia and I have been planning this for a week. She’s making rice crispy treats.”

“Okay, well maybe I just won’t go.”

“Whizzzzzer, you have to come. Remember last year when you fell in that puddle?”

“Uh, yeah, and completely ruined my favourite button down.”

“Okay, first of all, that was on you for wearing a dress shirt to a hang out. Second, think of the memories, and how we brought you back to Cordelia’s dorm and made you sit fully clothed in the shower and then we all got in the shower and then Delia’s roommate walked in and then just turned around and retreated. Third, I definitely told Trina that story.”

Whizzer flopped down onto his bed and sighed into his pillow. What he needed was a nap. And a Xanax. Both, actually. 

“Fine, I’ll go. But you better not fuck this up.”

Mendel smiled, then frowned, once he realized he was going to have to keep a secret. A big secret. Whizzer didn’t care so much about keeping this whole thing hidden from their friends, but 

Marvin did. Whizzer knew if he told everyone, it would likely fuck up his whole relationship with Marvin. Not that he cared about what he had with Marvin, but it would be pretty awkward if they hated each other considering Marvin was friends with Trina and Charlotte.

Sure, they didn’t love each other, but Whizzer didn’t hate the guy. And frankly, he didn’t want to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments guys, even on older works I've posted. They really keep me motivated to write.
> 
> Post Script: I'm thinking of writing a Hanukkah chapter, but I don't really know a lot about the holiday. I want to be as accurate as possible, so any advice you could give would be well appreciated!


	14. Fireworks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the one where Mendel keeps a secret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh god guys, after the last chapter all this Perryshmirtz art is popping up on my Tumblr and I can never unsee it

Marvin stumbled over his own feet as he made his way to the door, partially hopping on one foot as he hadn’t quite pulled his shoe all the way on. He swung open the door, still twisting his foot back and forth in order to shimmy his shoe the rest of the way on.

“The hell are you doing here?”

“S’nice to see you too.”

Marvin crossed his arms, staring Whizzer up and down. They had seen each other since the whole Mendel situation had gone down, but Marvin had high-key been a lot more careful about where they were seen together. He had minimized their after school studying, and ensured that they went back to Marvin’s dorm and Marvin’s dorm only. When asked about what the deal with Mendel was, Whizzer only replied “don’t even worry ‘bout it.” Marvin was hesitant about going to this dumb Thanksgiving thing anyway, but he didn’t have a good enough excuse for Trina other than “I don’t want your boyfriend to tell everyone about how I’ve been sleeping with his best friend” so he had no choice but to go.

“I thought I was meeting you there,” Marvin finished.

Whizzer leaned against the doorframe and brushed his hair back a bit. He was wearing a warm-looking bomber jacket and a scarf, appropriately dressed for the weather. “Change of plans. Apparently, Mendel wasn’t allowed to park the truck in the school parking lot, so we gotta meet him and the girls somewhere. We’re picking up Jason whose getting dropped of by one of his six parents and taking a bus over to the truck.”

Marvin nodded. Okay, so that kinda made sense. “Fine, just let me grab my stuff real quick.”

He retreated into his dorm and grabbed his backpack along with one of the fleece blankets he and Trina had purchased earlier. He closed the door behind him and began the short walk out of the building with Whizzer, taking the stairs of course. It had become a little chilly over time. Exams were coming up, and cramming season was afoot. As much as Marvin hated the idea of diving headfirst into a pool of lies that was intertwined with his new friend group, he was kind of relieved to have a break.

About halfway across the path to where Jason was waiting for them, Marvin’s phone buzzed. He pulled it from his pocket, expecting it to be a text from Charlotte or Trina, only to see the call screen on his phone.

“Hold on for a sec,” Marvin said, putting out a hand to halt Whizzer.

Whizzer stopped, turning to look at Marvin as he raised his cell to his ear.

“Hey, mom, this isn’t a great time.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow, looking Marvin straight in the eye as he spoke on the phone. Marvin didn’t look back at him, he was instead absorbed in conversation. 

“Yeah, no, I’ve been kinda busy. Exams and all, but I’ll come home for Hanukkah.”

Whizzer blinked. He gripped the strap of his messenger bag, tapping his heel. He was regretting not wearing a hat in this weather, his ears were getting cold. Marvin’s face shifted as he listened to the voice on the other line, he forced a laugh and a fake smile.

“I swear, as soon as I get a girlfriend, you’ll be the first to know.”

That one caused Whizzer to do a double take. Marvin finally turned to return Whizzer’s look, still holding the phone up to his ear. He looked pained, poorly attempting to cover it up by showing his teeth.

“Right, okay, of course. I promise. Okay, I’ll call you back tomorrow. Alright. Love you too, okay, bye, love you, bye.”

He finally pulled the phone from his ear and ended the call. He hesitantly looked back up at Whizzer, knowing full well that he had heard his side of the phone call.

“I know what you’re thinking, but I swear, I’m gonna tell her.”

Whizzer shrugged. “It’s none of my business. It’s not like you’re bringing me home for the holidays.”

Marvin forced a small smile, before stuffing his phone back into his pocket and continuing down the path. Even though he said otherwise, Whizzer actually was thinking what Marvin thought he was thinking. Whizzer understood that it was hard coming out to your parents, but how did his friends not even know? Even if he wasn’t telling them, it was kind of obvious.

They reached the parking lot to find Jason sitting at the bus stop bench. He was bundled up from head to two. Something about the way Jason was sitting, leant at a 45-degree angle and struggling to type on his phone, made Marvin think that it wasn’t his choice to dress in such a fashion. As Jason saw the two elder students approaching him, he stuffed his phone into his pocket and stood up from the bench.

“Jesus, took ya long enough.”

Whizzer grinned, sidling up to Jason and bumping his shoulder against the boy’s. “My bad, we were busy rescuing some orphans from a basement fire, sorry if we’ve caused you any inconvenience.”

Jason rolled his eyes so far back they were staring at his brain. The bus pulled up, and he ushered his new friends on. Of course, Jason would never admit that they were his friends, but anyone who had been observing his life from a third-person narrative could obviously tell how he truly felt.

The bus ride was short, only one stop away. It was the parking lot of a Target; Mendel had parked the rusty blue pickup truck in the back corner. Why, you ask, were they driving a truck that was well over 30 years old rather than one of the fancy overkill pickup trucks that people drove around whether they needed it or not? Because Mendel didn’t know anyone that used their trucks as compensation. The only people he knew that drove trucks were actual farmers, therefore this truck had some hay in the bed and smelled like a horse watched Netflix in it.

As the three boys approached the truck, they saw Charlotte and Cordelia sitting in the back, chatting. Cordelia was the first to spot them, she immediately stood, perking up. She hopped down from the bed of the truck and onto the pavement, stumbling a bit. Charlotte followed her down, using the side of the bed as support so she didn’t make the same mistake as Cordelia. Cordelia started forward, doing a weird side-to-side skip and she bounded toward the three boys.

“You must be Jason!” she exclaimed giddily, snatching his hand in hers and rapidly shaking it. Charlotte, on the other hand, took a much more collected approach, and instead chose to send Jason a curt nod.

Jason’s eyes were wider than usual, surprised at how quickly Cordelia invaded his personal space. He looked to Whizzer, his eyes screaming for help. It was almost funny to Marvin, how as soon as Jason was in the presence of this girl, his tough and confident charade dropped in seconds.

“Aight, Delia, don’t hound the kid too hard,” Whizzer interjected, pushing Jason along, “we should try to get out there before the fireworks start.”

The group agreed, stuffing themselves into the truck. Mendel drove, Trina took shotgun, and Cordelia squeezed into the fold-down middle sat in the front. In the back, Charlotte, Marvin, and Whizzer took the row, with Jason laying stretched out across the boys’ laps. Luckily, the drive wasn’t too long, otherwise Marvin was sure he would have a fit if he had to go any longer with a fidgety Jason almost kicking him in the face every few minutes.

“Just in time!” Mendel exclaimed, bolting out of his seat, barely remembering to set the emergency break. 

They had parked at the entrance of a field, on the strip of grass coming off the gravel road where tractors would normally pull off. There was no one else for miles, which made sense, considering it was winter in the country. The four students occupying the backseat toppled out of the vehicle, Jason almost face-planting into the soil if Whizzer hadn’t caught him by the coat. When Marvin had finally made his way to the bed of the truck, trying his best to keep his shoes clean, Trina had already set up camp. There wasn’t much to set up, really, she just laid out some blankets and dumped a tote bag full of snacks in the corner, but it wasn’t like Marvin was complaining.

Marvin turned his head slightly to look towards Whizzer. He was helping hoist Jason up into the bed of the truck. Charlotte was already up there, holding the kid’s arm and leaning backwards as Jason slowly rose against gravity. Jason flew up, toppling onto a pile of blankets. Whizzer laughed, before grasping the side of the truck bed and hopping up, twisting in the air, and sitting on the lip. 

Finally, he looked back at Marvin. His toothy grin slowly relaxed into a sincere, small smile.

“Marvin! Get your ass up here!” Cordelia called.

Marvin obeyed, knowing better than to fall to the wrath of Cordelia. He followed Mendel up, settling in the back corner next to a bag of snacks. Trina sidled up next to him, reaching across his lap to take out a bag of Goldfish crackers to share with Mendel.

“Look!” Jason shouted, pointing to the sky. He had a look of pure wonder in his eye, the colourful reflection of the fireworks gleaming through his glasses.

Six heads turned in the direction of Jason’s index finger, following it towards the dark sky, now illuminated by a surplus of small lights dancing across the sky. Now, all that could be heard was the crackle of the fireworks and the sound of crickets echoing through the night air.

Marvin looked back down for a moment, ripping his eyes from their fixed point in the atmosphere. There, looking back at him, was Whizzer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiya, I need some help ya'll.
> 
> I'm trying to fit a few Hanukkah chapters into this and I really don't want to screw it up, so if anyone can help me out, I've got a few questions.
> 
> 1\. what exactly happens? I've tried to do some research, and I'm getting food, lighting the menorah, and gifts. Is there an order to it?
> 
> 2\. Is it the same thing every night? Or does is vary?
> 
> 3\. Anything else I should know? Please tell me anything you've got as I don't really know anything and i want to be as accurate as possible
> 
> Thanks for any input you guys have. The next few chapters I'm gonna try to cram in a bunch of life experiences so buckle in because you're gonna get a taste of that good old country life.


	15. Road Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where they drive six hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, something I actually know stuff about

At this point, Marvin’s full weight was on top of his suitcase. Even at that point, he couldn’t get the zipper to close. He was huffing and puffing, on the verge of saying fuck it, and stuffing the contents into a heavy-duty trash bag instead.

Just before he had the opportunity to make any bad decisions, there was a knock at the door. Behind that door was, of course, Whizzer. Because who else would it be?

“Hey,” he said, as per his usual greeting. He held up a long black cord, waving it around in the air. “You left your laptop charger in my dorm. Figured I’d give it express delivery.”

“Oh. Thanks,” Marvin replied, taking the cord from Whizzer’s grasp and chucking it onto his bed.

Whizzer leaned to the side, looking past Marvin’s shoulder. The room was considerably barer than usual, about a quarter of the room’s content had been shoved into a suitcase far too small for what Marvin was trying to cram into it. He wasn’t even going for that long, just a week-ish, but Marvin was packing in case every possible disaster scenario occurred while he was gone from his dorm. 

Exams were over, and it was Christmas break. At this point in the year, snow had littered the ground as most of the students had left to visit their families for the holidays. Most of the students included Trina and Charlotte, each of his friends being followed home by their respective significant other. Marvin, on the other hand, had held off a bit before heading home.

“Do you need a hand?” Whizzer proposed, stepping into Marvin’s dorm without an invitation.

Marvin shrugged, knowing that as soon as Whizzer had made himself comfortable, there was no point in trying to get him out of his room. Whizzer perched himself on top of the suitcase as Marvin struggled to finally close the zipper. His extra height made him helpful in squashing down the excess clothes. 

“Where you goin’ anyway?” Whizzer asked, watching as Marvin pulled a backpack from his closet. 

“Home,” Marvin replied, packing up his laptop. “It’s just a few hours drive out of the city, I’ll only be gone a few days.” Marvin looked up, “how ‘bout you?”

Whizzer shrugged. “Nothing. Cordelia invited me to go with her to Charlotte’s, but I didn’t wanna third wheel. Besides, planes are scary.”

Marvin raised his eyebrows. “Planes are scary, but elevators aren’t?”

“Hey, people die on planes, people don’t die in elevators.”

“I’m sure it’s happened.”

“Anyways, it’s like whatever. I’ll probably just hang out in the library for the next 192 hours or something.”

“You’re not going home?”

Whizzer twitched slightly, then shrugged. “I’m not on great terms with my parents. Besides, we never really did much for the holidays anyway.”

Marvin’s opened his mouth to speak, but his brain stopped. This next thing he said was such an un-Marvin like thing to say, but he said it anyway.

“Do you wanna come home with me?”

God, that sounded way more forward than Marvin meant it to. Whizzer’s eyebrows rose so high they almost flew into his hair.

“I mean, I’m just gonna be home for like, a week, and my mom said I could bring a friend. You know, if you don’t wanna be here by yourself over the holidays,” Marvin sputtered in an attempt to backtrack.

Whizzer stayed silent for a moment, thinking. After a few seconds, he lifted his head.

“Yeah, okay.”

___________

The boys went to Whizzer and Mendel’s room, lugging along Marvin’s suitcase. Mendel’s side of the room was fairly cleaned out, him and Trina had been gone for the greater part of the month. It took Whizzer longer than Marvin would’ve liked to get packed. He was very particular in how his shirts were folded, and described to Marvin how important it was to choose baseline clothes, that could be re-worn and went with anything. During this time, Marvin texted his mom to let her know that he wasn’t going alone.

“Are you sure these are the most practical clothes?” Marvin questioned, pointing to the various button downs and patent leather shoes.

“This Hanukkah Marv, not a rodeo. I think I’m fine wearing these.”

“Aight,” Marvin replied, holding up his hands in surrender, “suit yourself.”

After a half hour of packing clothes far too stylish for Marvin to comprehend, the two boys found themselves set up in Marvin’s car. Not before stopping at the bakery of course, and loading up on coffee and doughnuts.

“Okay,” Whizzer said, drumming his hands across the dashboard and cueing up a road trip playlist, “let’s get this show on the road!”

“Right, just six hours.”

Whizzer blinked, then blinked again as he tried to comprehend Marvin’s words. “Scuse me? Where the fuck do you live that’s six fucking hours away?”

“Well, according to Google maps, its six hours and nine minutes. It’s upstate.”

“Upstate? More like upper Canada.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “Chill, by the time we get there, it’ll seem like we were barely driving at all.”

**HOUR ONE**

“Do you think when fish get pulled out of water, it’s like jumping in a lake for us?”

Marvin looked to Whizzer with bewilderment. “Why would you ask me that?”

“I mean, they’re in water all the time, so they probably don’t even know they’re wet. So when they get pulled out of the water, it’s that change of environment.”

“Yeah, but they still have water on them. If we went into water, we wouldn’t have air dripping off us.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“But you know, our bones are always wet.”

“…Holy shit.”

**HOUR TWO**

“Pass me a croissant.”

Marvin held out his hand, waiting to be croissant-ed. Whizzer just looked down guiltily.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“I’m sorry! They’re my favourite breakfast pastry, I couldn’t help myself!”

“We’ve been in this car for two hours, and you ate all the croissants? We got half a dozen!”

Whizzer elected to ignore him.

“…Wanna play the licence plate game?”

**HOUR THREE**

“What even is this music anyway?”

“80’s. Also known as the best decade for music.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “It’s totally overrated.”

Rather than respond, Whizzer reached into the backseat and rummaged around. In doing so, he squeezed in between the two front seats, effectively elbowing Marvin in the face.

“The hell?” he complained, but Whizzer continued to ignore him.

Whizzer fell back into his seat, clutching a fleece blanket. Marvin cocked an eyebrow. “Don’t judge me,” Whizzer said defensively, “it is fucking freezing in here and you refuse to turn up the heat.”

“If I turn up the heat, it messes with the engine.”

“How old even is this car?”

Marvin shrugged. “Older than me.”

Whizzer leaned back, wrapping the fleece tightly around himself. He bobbed his head to the music.

“This music is getting old,” Marvin complained.

“Fine, you got something better?”

Marvin jerked his head towards the glove compartment, gesturing for Whizzer to open it. When he did, half a dozen CDs toppled out. Whizzer lifted one up and examined it.

“Are these…Broadway musicals?”

Marvin nodded enthusiastically. “Take your pick.”

Whizzer groaned, “musicals are the woooorst. They all sound exactly the same and follow the same plot.”

“Hey! That’s not true.”

“Sure it is,” Whizzer said with determination. He turned to Marvin and sternly crossed his arms. “Hero wants a thing, hero gets the thing in a twisted way, thing didn’t turn out the way they thought, hero gets sad, hero sings a song about how things might be okay, hero turns things around and things end up ultimately okay.”

Marvin narrowed his eyes, quickly looking in back and forth between Whizzer and the road. “Okay, first of all, that’s only like 75% true, second, you’ve gotta at least try it out.”

“Over. My. Dead. Body.”

**HOUR FOUR**

“Okay, but I just don’t understand why he turns himself in.”

“He’s an honest man, he can’t let some other guy go to jail in his place just because he never fulfilled his parole.”

“Yeah, but didn’t he also make a promise to take care of Cosette? If he turns himself in, he’s basically setting her up to die.”

“But he’s planning on running away after.”

“Probability wise, that’s probably not gonna pan out.”

“Just, shut up and listen.”

“…”

“…”

“Do they ever talk in this musical?”

**HOUR FIVE**

“Alright, almost there.”

Whizzer looked out the window as Marvin began to debrief him. The thick urban infrastructure of New York City thinned out the further north they went, and now there were only a few houses each mile. The ground had a nice blanket of snow draped over it; the light of the sun reflected against it as it was directed into Whizzer’s eyes. The weather had been mostly clear for the duration of the drive, but now snow was beginning to fall from the sky in a small quantity.

“It hurts to look at the snow,” Whizzer complained, squinting harshly.

Marvin rolled his eyes. “That’s why people wear goggles when snowmobiling. To prevent snow blindness.”

Whizzer raised his eyebrows. “Snow blindness? That’s a thing?”

“A lot of things are things.”

“So, where do you live anyways?”

“Just a bit west from here,” Marvin replied. At that moment, he slowed to car and turned left off onto a gravel road. Whizzer did not like the feeling of this. He clutched the handle on the door, cringing as they rumbled down the road.

“So remember,” Marvin continued, “we’re just friends. Classmates, students, whatever.”

“Chill, Marv, I’m not gonna start vomiting rainbows at your parents are something.”

Marvin rolled his eyes so hard it hurt his head.

He pulled the car into a long, dirt driveway. It led through the intersection of two fields, both empty and snowed over. The turnoff was marked by a tin grain bin and quonset. As they went further down the road, the reached a round-a-bout that circled a large yard light. Surrounding the road was a series of buildings, barns, sheds, and shops. 

“You live on a fucking farm?”

Marvin shrugged.

“I’ve gotta say, Marv, this really isn’t what I was expecting.”

“What were you expecting?”

“Honestly? A mansion along a river? Maybe a penthouse where all the walls are glass?”

“Well,” Marvin said as he unbuckled his seat belt, “I guess you’re in for a treat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your comments and kudos-es (I don't know how words work)
> 
> Here's another chapter in a lead up to a multi chapter vacation saga. I wanted to change up the setting for a bit before jumping back into the main "plot."
> 
> Please let me know if you've got any suggestions or things you just want to see (or even something you've liked in the work so far so I can know how to improve future chapters).
> 
> Thanks y'all


	16. Air Mattresses & Fried Foods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Whizzer learns a thing or two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to @thethrashparticle and @Randlsmox for help with the Hanukkah stuff. I didn't end up writing tons because I'm deathly terrified of screwing it up.

Whizzer was not an outdoorsy person. Never was, never would be. That was why he played racquetball instead of tennis. That was why he did photography instead of waterskiing. He used to purposely get in trouble back in elementary school just so he would be kept inside for recess. His mom thought it was hilarious. His dad…not so much.

He lingered inside of the car as Marvin got out and wandered over to open up the trunk and get out his suitcase. Whizzer pulled the fleece around himself a little tighter and prepared himself for the harshness of the outdoors.

As soon as he exited the vehicle, the wind hit him like a rogue bus. He crinkled up his face, internally complaining about how long it would take to fix his hair after this. He rounded to the back of the car, where Marvin was standing. He handed him his suitcase, took his own in his hand, then closed the trunk. Whizzer took a moment to survey the area. Oh god, he could hear the cows mooing, and the chickens bock-ing. He was beginning to mildly regret agreeing to go on this trip.

“This way,” Marivn said, gesturing to the pathway leading to a house. The house wasn’t small, but it wasn’t huge either. There was a rickety old porch, that could definitely use a little TLC. A dog bowl rested next to the door, still half filled with food.

Whizzer followed him over and up the stairs. He tried to hide it from Marvin as well as possible as he struggled to lug his suitcase up. It was just three stairs. The door swung open before Marvin had the chance to reach for the handle. There stood a woman, short, stocky, a few grey hairs. She had a warm smile on her face, and was wearing an apron over some grubby clothes. The two boys stepped into the house, Whizzer a bit more hesitantly than Marvin. 

The woman instantly enveloped Marvin in a hug as soon as he set down his suitcase. The first thing Whizzer noticed was how warm the place was. It smelt like a wood fire, then entire house immediately had a homey feel. 

“Mom,” Marvin said, pulling away from the hug, “this is Whizzer.”

Whizzer was pulled back into the real world, realizing the attention was now on him. He looked back at the woman, now identified as Marvin’s mom. Her expression faltered for a moment as she noticed him, but it quickly resumed its former state. No one seemed to notice but Whizzer. She reached forward and pulled Whizzer into a warm embrace.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” she said. “You can call me Lisa.”

“Where’s dad?” Marvin questioned, his gaze darting through the house. 

The entrance led right into the kitchen. To the left, past a staircase to the basement, was the dining room. To the right, a few stairs led up to a large living room. There were several doors spread about that Whizzer assumed led to bathrooms and bedrooms.

“He’s just finishing up outside,” she said, “he should be in soon to help with supper. You boys should go set up shop. Auntie Kathy and Uncle Roger are taking the corner room, so you two’ll be in the basement.”

“Alright,” Marvin replied, picking up his suitcase again, “we’ll be right back up to help with the food.”

Whizzer gave Lisa a small smile and a nod before shuffling along behind Marvin. They made their way down the rickety stairs into the basement. It was…not what he was expecting. The place was cement, and one wall was covered with a variety of tools mounted to the wall above a work space. In the corner was a gas welder, along with a few indistinguishable things covered in tarp.

“Marvin, why does your basement look like a murder dungeon?”

Marvin led Whizzer through another doorway. “It usually floods in spring, so we can’t put in carpet or anything. You won’t even notice.”

Oh, Whizzer was noticing. They ended up in a small room with one small window in the top corner. There was a double bed, a generator with a sheet over it, and a small wood stove. There was a tiny bathroom connected to the room whose walls were lined with mousetraps. A rolled-up air mattress sat in the corner.

“I’m gonna die down here,” Whizzer whispered to himself. 

Marvin dropped his suitcase onto the ground and Whizzer followed suit. 

“We should probably get back up there,” Marvin stated, already on his way back upstairs.

Whizzer wanted to be optimistic, he really did, but this situation was looking bleak. He was voluntarily out here in the middle of nowhere for a week. This was going to be a disaster of epic proportions.

And as Whizzer followed Marvin back up into the stairs he couldn’t help but acknowledge the fact that every single one of Marvin’s family members matched his internal picture of what a farmer would look like. Asides from the cowboy boot, hats, and a southern accent, they fit the bill fairly well. They wore the same boots, they either wore these fire-hose material like jackets or fleece sweaters that went up to their chin. They also said “ope” whenever they bumped into someone.

When they arrived back upstairs, the kitchen was already five people full. Lisa was there, along with two middle-aged men, a middle-aged woman, and a short elderly lady. Marvin introduced them as his dad (whom Whizzer should call Bob), his Auntie Kathy and Uncle Roger, and his Bubbe. They were all bustling about the kitchen, throwing different things on frying pans and making the house smell like love and happiness in the form of fried foods.

Even though Whizzer was half-Jewish, his family never really did the whole Hanukkah thing. His mom was Jewish, but she didn’t have a large family, so they always spent the holidays with his Catholic dad’s family, celebrating Christmas. This was all new to him, yet he already felt pretty comfortable around Marvin’s family.

“What are those?” Whizzer questioned, gesturing to the flat fried things Bob was working with.

“They’re latkes,” Marvin replied, “they’re like potato pancakes.” Marvin moved towards the partially connected island (which wasn’t really an island then), nodding to his family members in acknowledgement as he bypassed them. Whizzer stood on the other side of the island, not sure what he was supposed to be doing.

“What are those?” Whizzer asked again, pointing at what looked like jelly doughnuts.

“Sufganiyot, they’re basically jelly doughnuts.”

“Sick.”

Whizzer watched Marvin work, helping out whenever he could. The atmosphere was really comforting, Marvin’s family treated him as if he was their own. And even though Whizzer felt welcome, he couldn’t help but feel guilty. They did the Hanukkah stuff Whizzer saw in the very few movies that include anything about Hanukkah. They lit a candle, they said prayers, they ate food, exchanged a few gifts (Whizzer got some cool chocolate coins), and he even learned how to use a dreidel. But Whizzer wished this wasn’t a new experience for him, he was half-Jewish, and he’d only ever celebrated Christmas. Why had he never had kugel or gorged on those jelly doughnuts (which were really fucking good) before?

As the night came to a close, they were all up in the living room chatting about nothing. Kathy and Roger were telling Whizzer a story about the time a young Marvin went sledding and clotheslined under a tree branch. It was overall an enjoyable story, it had him giggling like a child. However, the night was getting late and Whizzer couldn’t hide the frequent yawns he was expressing. Before he knew it, Lisa was shooing them both off to bed, insisting that they needed a good night’s rest.

“I like your family,” Whizzer declared, pacing out of the bathroom with a toothbrush still in his mouth. Marvin was looking over his suitcase that was open on the bed. He had already changed into his pyjamas, and was now trying to decide what socks to wear tomorrow. Whizzer didn’t like pyjamas, he was more of a t-shirt and boxers kind of person.

“Why?” Marvin questioned, in the way people do when they don’t like to admit that their family is actually pretty great.

“They’re just so loving. It’s like, I ate five of those doughnuts and they still tried to get me to eat more. Those are the best kinds of family members, the ones that make you eat.”

Marvin shrugged, then proceeded to zip up his suitcase and set it on the floor. “They’re nice, but they’re also pretty conservative. Most people around here are.”

Whizzer looked up at Marvin, who wasn’t looking at him. Things were starting to click into place. Of course Marvin would be so hesitant about coming out when he grew up out here. Whizzer didn’t really have to think about it, growing up in the city. And even though there was the occasional slur thrown about my teenage boys, it hadn’t been that big of a deal for him when he came out. Or, he didn’t exactly come out, it was more like his parents accidentally walked in on him with a boy and pretty much figured out the rest.

“So…I’ll take the air mattress, you take the bed,” Marvin said, already moving towards the pump.

Whizzer looked to Marvin in disbelief. “Marv, I’m not making you sleep on an air mattress.”

“Well, I’m not letting you sleep on one either.”

“How bout this genius solution,” Whizzer replied sarcastically, “neither of us use the air mattress, and we just sleep in the bed like normal people.”

“Whizzer, we can’t, what if my mom walks in or something?”

“Chill. The door locks, and besides, no one in their right mind would choose to come down here.”

Marvin looked in between Whizzer and the door a few times, his face twisted up as he mentally debated Whizzer’s points.

“Fine,” he said after a moment. “But I’m making a pillow wall.”

Whizzer rolled his eyes. “There are two pillows on this bed, and god knows I’m not breaking my neck on this mattress.”

Marvin sighed, giving in and getting under to covers. Whizzer retreated back into the bathroom to spit out his toothpaste before returning to the bed. He crawled under the rather thin quilt and burrowed into the mattress. He missed his mountain of blankets.

“I’m gonna freeze to death in here,” Whizzer declared, already curled up into a ball. 

“Chill, the wood stove keeps it really warm in here, just wait for it to kick in.”

Whizzer narrowed his eyebrows, electing to lift up his feet and place them on Marvin’s stomach. Marvin yelped as Whizzer’s freezing feet touched his warm skin, flinching away.

“Jesus Christ, how are you always so cold?”

“My outsides reflect my insides.”

“You are actually shaking the entire bed with your shivering right now.”

“I can’t help it!”

Marvin sighed, then reached his arm up and wrapped it around Whizzer, pulling him into his chest.

“This is just a professional courtesy,” Marvin stated, “so I’m not sharing a bed with a chihuahua.”

Whizzer didn’t reply, he just relaxed and allowed himself to be warmed up by the man in bed with him. A few months ago, when this had started, Whizzer could never imagine them curling up in bed together. But now, well, Whizzer could get used to this.

Maybe this week wouldn’t be so bad after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm basing this farm off of a mix of my neighbour's farm and the farm where my dad grew up back in Saskatchewan. I have no idea if farms in New York operate differently, so just take it with a grain of salt.
> 
> Comments are always appreciated. See you soon!


	17. Whoops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Whizzer makes a scarf

Whizzer woke up at 7:30 in the morning. He didn’t plan to, nor want to. When Whizzer woke up, he had rolled onto the other side of the bed, expecting to fall back onto Marvin’s chest. Instead, he fell through the air and landed on a cool, empty bedspread.

He looked up, failing to blink the sleep out of his eyes. Marvin was standing beside the bed, pulling the zipper the rest of the way up his sweater. He was dressed up in clothes similar to what his family was wearing the day prior: a weird fleece sweater, green work pants that looked like they were out of an army surplus store, and some boots that were part rubber and part canvas.

“The fuck you doing?” Whizzer asked, still half asleep and rapidly blinking to try and stay awake. His head was tossed back into a pillow, his hair ruffled up and sticking out in all directions. There was a digital clock on the bedside table with the time, far too early for someone to be waking up during winter break.

“Someone has to feed the cows,” Marvin said nonchalantly as he briefly walked into the bathroom to check his hair. He popped his head back out. “Wanna help?”

Whizzer flopped back down, tucking the blanket back up into his neck. “Hell no. I’m not about to go full farmer out here. Just get me a cowboy hat and boots while you’re at it, huh?”

Marvin rolled his eyes as Whizzer turned over and attempted to go back to sleep. He didn’t really expect Whizzer to want to get up anyways, he wasn’t the outdoorsy type.

____________

When Whizzer woke up for the second time, he was satisfied with the amount of sleep he had achieved. He immediately rolled over to check his phone, only to find a notification deficit screen. The service up here was shit, and he hadn’t gotten the chance to ask for the Wi-Fi password yet.

He sat up, slowly scooting to the edge of the bed. A part of him wished he had gone with Marvin, only because he was so creeped out down here all alone. The tarped-up motorcycles definitely looked like Slenderman in one way or another, and all Whizzer knew was that he needed to get out of there, fast.

After showering and brushing his teeth and the works, he made his way upstairs. This meant as soon as he made it through the doorway, he dashed through the basement and up the stairwell before any demons could latch onto his legs. The house was quiet, quiet and empty. There was no one in the kitchen, nor the dining room. Whizzer assumed everyone was outside, doing whatever it is farm people do. Riding pigs and fixing tractors or something. He lurked through the halls, peeking around the corners as he tried to figure out what to do for the rest of the day. As he stepped into the living room, however, he discovered that he wasn’t alone.

There was Marvin’s Bubbe, sitting in an armchair, knitting what looked to be a very long blanket. It was dark blue, rumpling up on the floor as it rested on her lap whilst she worked away at the yarn. She looked up, noticing Whizzer lingering in the door for several moments.

“Hello dear,” she said sweetly. That was the thing about her, she was a combination of every perfect grandmother you had ever heard of, rolled into one. When she called Whizzer dear, he knew he had to do everything he could to protect this precious soul from the realities of the world. “Would you mind refilling my tea? The kettle is still of the stove, go ahead and pour yourself a cup as well.”

Whizzer nodded, not verbally responding. He took her empty teacup that was sitting on the coffee table and retreated to the kitchen. He retrieved a mug that read “I <3 NYC” on it and poured some tea into it as well, tossing in some milk and sugar. He carefully balanced both cups in his hands as he carried them back to where she was sitting. He set her cup on the coffee table, then took a seat with his own cup on the armchair next to her.

They both sat in mildly awkward silence for a few minutes (at least, it was awkward on Whizzer’s side) before he decided he should probably try to initiate conversation.

“Whatcha making?” he asked.

“A blanket,” she replied simply, confirming Whizzer’s hypothesis.

“Is it difficult? Crocheting, I mean.”

She shook her head. “At first it is, but once you know how, you never forget.”

Whizzer nodded thoughtfully. He wondered what it was like, being able to start something and finish it. Whizzer’s attention span was far too short for this kind of thing, besides, he rarely had the opportunity to be able to sit and do anything other than homework all the time.

“Would you like to try?”

Whizzer looked up in surprise. “Really?”

She nodded, already digging around in her yarn bag as she pulled out a ball of green yarn and a metal hook. Whizzer scooted closer to her so he could see what to do, not wanting to admit how excited he was, even though it was clearly evident from his posture.

“I thought there were supposed to be needles,” Whizzer wondered aloud, taking the hook in hand.

“That’s knitting, dear,” she said, taking the yarn and making some weird loop out of it before placing it over the hook, “this is crocheting, it’s much easier.”

He nodded his head in understanding, setting the ball of yarn in his lap as she showed him the steps. It was a little confusing at first, but once the first line was down, he was beginning to get the hang of it. Occasionally, he would put the hook in the wrong stitch and his scarf would get a little funky looking, but whenever that happened, Marvin’s Bubbe would just reassure him and tell him it looked great. It was fine, anyways, skinny scarfs were all the rage.

There was something incredibly calming about doing that same repetitive motion, sipping tea every few minutes as his accomplishment grew more evident my the second. As they worked, the two of them chatted and made small talk as the hours went by.

“I’ve been pretty happy with it so far, the workload is a lot bigger than I thought it’d be, but I’m handling it,” Whizzer vented.

“That is nice. I wanted to be a doctor when I was a girl.”

Whizzer raised an eyebrow, looking back and forth from Marvin’s Bubbe to his “scarf.”

“Why didn’t you become one?”

She sighed softy, intensely working on her blanket. “My father wouldn’t allow it. I became a teacher instead.”

“Do you regret it?” Whizzer asked hesitantly, “I mean, not following your dreams?”

“I suppose,” she admitted. “But then I realize that if I had become a doctor, I probably wouldn’t be where I am now.”

Whizzer nodded thoughtfully. He couldn’t imagine giving up his schooling to do something he wasn’t passionate about. Just then, the door swung open, and Marvin walked through. Oh god, he looked like such a farmer.

He had snow littering his hat as he kicked off his boots. Man, was Whizzer relieved he wasn’t out there. It was cold and snowing and all around looked like a disaster. Okay, the weather wasn’t that bad, but anything below sweater weather was bad in Whizzer’s opinion.

“Have you not gone outside at all today?” Marvin questioned once he noticed where Whizzer was sitting.

“Nope,” he replied proudly. “But I’m crocheting a scarf, and we’re making challah later.”

Marvin smiled to himself at how happy Whizzer was about this. In truth, Marvin was a little nervous when he realized what it meant, Whizzer going to his house. He would meet his family and see his childhood home, and that was the kind of things couples did. He and Whizzer were definitely not a couple.

Marvin shrugged off his jacked and traded out his snowy boots for some crocs. Whizzer always teased him whenever he wore crocs, but this was Marvin’s house now.

“Where’re you going?” Whizzer asked, watching as Marvin made his way to the stairwell. 

“Downstairs,” he replied simply, “I’m supposed to dig out the snowmobiles.”

“The snowmo-whats?”

It was too late; Marvin was already long gone.

The next few days went something like that. Marvin would get up early, invite Whizzer out, and Whizzer would refuse. Whizzer spent his days inside with Marvin’s Bubbe, making progress on his scarf and occasionally helping her cook. At night, they’d light another candle and Whizzer would make sure he consumed as many Hanukkah gelt as he was allowed. It was nice, this whole family dynamic. Not something he was used to, but something he quickly had grown fond of. 

He was almost dreading the week’s ending.

_______

**My dorm**

**Now**

Oh god, nothing good could possibly come from that. 

Mendel was walking across campus, on his way back from the coffee shop. He and Trina had just returned from their little vacation to her place, which was all around a nice experience. Trina’s parents were nice, and they seemed to generally like him.

When he received the text from Cordelia, however, he couldn’t help but panic. That was what he did, though. Panic. Anytime anything happened, Mendel always assumed the worst. He practically sprinted over to Delia’s dorm, sweating right through his coat.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” he gasped, running through the door.

Cordelia was laying sprawled out on her bed with her laptop on her chest and her neck curled up so she could see what was on the screen.

“Hey!” she said happily, sitting up on her bed only to reveal that she was watching some comedy special with a guy running around in a three-piece suit. Mendel wasn’t one for comedy specials, he preferred Disney movies, personally.

“What the hell? I though you were dying or something.”

“Why on Earth would you think that?”

“Because you sent an urgent text without context.”

Cordelia rolled her eyes and slid off her bed. “You honestly need to chill. Anyways, I was wondering where Whizzer is.”

“Oh, he sent me a text yesterday, apparently he went somewhere for the break.”

Cordelia raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “Really? He said he didn’t have anywhere to be, that’s why Char and I offered for him to go to her house with us.”

“Oh, I don’t know where he went.” That was a lie, Mendel knew exactly where he went, because Whizzer told him. He was at Marvin’s house, which if Mendel remembered correctly, was in the middle of nowhere. Oh god, they were probably having sex with each other in Marvin’s childhood bedroom, and Mendel was the only one that knew.

Cordelia paused, thinking for a moment. “What about Marvin?”

“What about Marvin?” Mendel asked incredibly suspiciously as his eyes flew open and he averted contact. He had to keep this secret; Whizzer would tear him apart if he knew he had told anyone.

“Where is he?”

“Uh…I do not know?”

“Huh.”

Oh fuck. She knew, she knew everything. Now Whizzer was going to break Mendel’s face and Mendel really liked his face. Getting plastic surgery would just mess up the whole dynamic he had going with his hair.

“Anyways, you wanna go to Subway or something? I’m craving fast food that isn’t actually fast food.”

Mendel exhaled a sigh of relief. “I’m literally holding a coffee in my hands as we speak.”

“Yeah, but it is like half empty and all over my fucking carpet.”

Mendel looked down at the now cold coffee in his hands that had spilled everywhere. Maybe it wasn’t the wisest idea to sprint over here.

“Fine, let’s go,” Mendel sighed.

Cordelia grinned, hopping up and pulling on her favourite leather jacket. She slipped on her sneakers and followed Mendel out the door.

“It’s really weird that Whizzer just left without telling me anything,” Cordelia started, absentmindedly picking at her nails.

Oh god, this was it, she knew.

“You think so?”

“Yeah, I mean, he usually tells us everything. I wonder where he went.”

“I wonder.” She was just screwing with him now, waiting until he couldn’t hold it in any longer and confessed.

“I don’t know, maybe he’s just out getting laid.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Do you think they still have the dozen cookies for five-”

“Okay, okay! I can’t take it anymore!” Mendel shouted, catching Cordelia off guard. “I know you know Whizzer and Marvin are sleeping with each other! He told me not to tell anyone but you obviously know and now you’re just patronizing me-”

“What?!”

Mendel looked up at Cordelia, where shock had crosser her face.

“What?”

“Marvin and Whizzer are fucking?”

“I mean, you clearly knew this. I walked in on them and they said not to tell but then you came over here being all weird about where Whizzer was and joking that he was getting laid so I just figured you knew!”

“No! I had no idea!”

Realization fell over Mendel’s face as it dawned upon him what he had done. Somehow Mendel had managed to gloriously screw up the one task he had. Now Cordelia knew everything. And even though Mendel know that this was a disaster and Whizzer was gonna kill him if he ever found out he told Cordelia, part of him was relieved that he finally got to tell someone. Then he remembered that his face was gonna be murdered.

“Well...fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again.
> 
> Sorry this one is kind of long, and the next one is gonna be even longer.
> 
> Thanks for your comments, even on my older works. I read each and every one of them, so they definitely do not go unappreciated.


	18. Animal Farm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Whizzer rides a horse?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, and sorry this one is so long.
> 
> Also, sorry Canada, but also not.

The morning before the day he and Marvin were supposed to head home, Whizzer woke up at six-fucking-thirty AM. It was a question for all as to why he was awake, but the answer was simple. He had to go to the bathroom.

The big problem with this was once he returned and laid back down on the bed, he could not fall back asleep. He was not about to just lay there while Marvin lived his best life and dreamt away for another hour, even if he did look really fucking adorable when he was sleeping.

Instead, Whizzer sat up, and trudged up the stairs. Whizzer expected to be alone as he lurked around the house, after all, what kind of maniac was awake at a time like this? Apparently, Marvin’s parents. Lisa and Bob were standing at the kitchen counter, chewing on toast, dressed in their work clothes.

“Whizzer!” Lisa exclaimed once she noticed him lurking in the stairwell, “morning!”

Whizzer jumped slightly as he realized his presence had been acknowledged. He couldn’t just slink back into the darkness now that he’d been noticed, so he instead decided to ascend the rest of the way up the stairs.

“Hey,” Whizzer replied, making his way over to the island. “Whatcha guys doing up so early?”

“Just starting early,” Bob replied, taking the last bite from his toast. “Care to join us?”

“Uh…no, that’s okay,” Whizzer replied nervously. It was easy to turn Marvin down because it was Marvin, but turning down Marvin’s parents was a whole other deal.

“Come on,” Lisa smiled, “you can help us move the bails for the cows.”

“I mean, I don’t really have outside clothes so-”

“We have a closet full of stuff from the army surplus store, go get whatever fits.”

Well, shit. There was no way he was getting out of this one, not with the way Marvin’s parents were smiling at him with that hopeful glint in their eyes.

So, yeah. That was how Whizzer found himself trudging across the yard in clothes far too big for him, way too early in the morning. He had managed to keep indoors this entire week, and just when he was about to be home free, he got dragged into this mess. It smelled like cows and cold. How does it smell like cold you ask? When you can feel your nasal cavity freeze and it hurts to breath. The reality was, it wasn’t that cold, but that wasn’t going to stop Whizzer from complaining about it.

“So…what are we doing exactly?”

“Well,” Bob began, as the three of them headed towards a barn. “You could either come help me move bails, or you could help Lisa feed the cattle.”

They entered the barn, which to Whizzer’s surprise, wasn’t red and wooden and sketchy.

“Move bails? How do you even do that?”

“With this old girl over here,” Bob smiled, gesturing to his right.

Whizzer followed where his hand was point up, up, and over to a great blue tractor.

“Holy shit,” Whizzer mumbled to himself. Whizzer had seen tractors before, or, at least pictures of them. The ones he saw were the size of lawnmowers, but this thing was twice his size. The back tire alone was taller than him.

“You should see the combines,” Bob replied, causing Whizzer to realize that he had just heard what he said. 

Whizzer didn’t really know what a combine was, and he didn’t need to know right at that moment. But out of the fear of his tiny little self being crushed under the wheel of this monstrosity, and the possibility that Bob might even ask him to drive it, Whizzer elected to go with Lisa. That was where Whizzer made his second mistake of the morning.

Cows smell terrible. 

Enough said. Sure, Whizzer should have figured they’d smell bad because that was a fact every single person knew, but he didn’t quite realize the capacity of their smell. He wanted to vomit, the cows were staring him down, probably wanting to crush him.

He followed Lisa over to large bin, filled with grain. She handed him a dirty red bucket, and picked one up for herself.

“I thought cows eat hay?” Whizzer questioned, examining the bucket in his hands.

“They do, but we also give them grain, so they have a better variety of nutrients,” she explained. She dipped her bucket into the bin, and pulled it out filled with grain.

Whizzer figured it was easy enough. He scooped up some grain, pulled out the bucket, and-holy shit that thing was heavier than he thought it was gonna be. He dragged the bucket along, pretending that every step wasn’t a struggle. Lisa was walking along effortlessly. They reached the cow pens, where dozens of cows pressed their heads through the fence, noticing that people had come bearing food.

They started filling the bins lining the fence with a layer of grain, which the nearby cows immediately went to town on. Whizzer instinctually jumped back as a cow charge forward, only to bury its head in grain. Now that he saw them close up, they were actually kind of cute. Sure, they were ginormous and smelly, and their moos were annoyingly loud, but they were still cute.

“So do we have to milk them or…?” Whizzer questioned, staring down the cow in front of him. It wasn’t black and white like he expected; it was brown. It also had a pink tag looped in its ear.

“No, these aren’t dairy cows.”

“Oh. Then what do you do with them?”

“They get turned into beef.”

Whizzer blinked as the obvious dawned upon him.

“What?”

“Well, it’s not like we keep them for fun.”

And with that, she was gone, picking up her bucket and returning to the grain bin. Whizzer ate beef and stuff, but something about actually seeing the animals he was eating made him re-think all of his life choices. He wasn’t actually going to stop eating beef though, because Whizzer was a mild hypocrite. He read somewhere that cows had best friends, and that was the only thing he could think about at that moment.

He returned to fill his bucket, then followed Lisa out of the barn. They walked across the yard to another building where they kept, yes, the horses.  
Whizzer had a secret fear. It was secret to everyone he knew, but it was also secret to Whizzer, as he didn’t realize he was afraid of horses until he came face to face with what was basically a four legged death machine.

Lisa moved along like nothing, dumping the contents of her bucket into the feeder. Whizzer hesitantly snuck along behind her, pretending he wasn’t hiding. He didn’t realize how big horses were. Actually, it might be better if the horse was taller than him, because when a horse was the same height as you and stared directly into your soul, is it really that ridiculous to be terrified for your life?

With one look from the horse it was evident that it wanted to stomp Whizzer to death with its hooves because it was fucking crazy.

“Do you want to pet it?” Lisa asked.

Touching a death machine was about the last thing on Whizzer’s mind. Lisa reached forward and patted it on the nose, the horsed replied by making a sound Whizzer could only describe as a purr. Lisa could tell how nervous Whizzer was around it, so rather than telling him it was okay and he could go inside, she took his hand and placed it on the horse.

So much profanity was running through Whizzer’s head, it was more populated than the Boston Marathon. His hand was so close to the horse’s food and bone shredding teeth, he was terrified of moving it out of fear of startling the horse. Was this what a stroke felt like?

“Why don’t you hop on?” Lisa proposed.

Actually, this was what a stroke felt like.

But what was Whizzer supposed to do? Tell her he was terrified of a herbivore because he didn’t like the look in its eye? Whizzer’s entire day was fucked the second he stepped outside that door. He regretted so many life decisions and he began to scale the gate.

“How the hell am I supposed to do this? It doesn’t have a saddle,” Whizzer complained, failing to hide the shakiness in his voice.

“Don’t worry,” Lisa persuaded, “we’re not taking her out of the pen, so you can just hold onto her mane.”

“Oh, great,” Whizzer murmured to himself unenthusiastically.

After whispering a small encouragement to himself, Whizzer hoisted his leg over the gate and onto the horse. It was at this moment that he wished he hadn’t let his pride get the better of him, and just turned down the offer to get on the horse.

He clutched onto that horse’s mane for dear life, regretting so many things in his life. Every time the horse stepped to the side, Whizzer held his breath, expecting to fall and be crushed under its hooves.

“I think she likes you,” Lisa claimed with a smile.

“Really?”

“Yes. So, how long have you known Marvin?” she asked, looking to make some conversation.

“Um, just since the beginning of the year. We have classes together,” Whizzer replied, sticking to the story.

“When Marvin said he was bringing someone back for the holidays, I must say, you aren’t what I was expecting.”

“Thank you?”

Lisa nodded. “But I suppose I’m happy Marvin has someone, no matter the circumstances. You really seem to make him happy.”

Whizzer cocked an eyebrow. Wait a minute, did she think-

“Her name is Nancy.”

Whizzer looked up from where his face was buried in the horse’s neck. Marvin was walking towards them, wearing his work clothes.

“What?”

“The horse. Her name is Nancy.”

“What kind of name is Nancy?”

“Like Nancy Kerrigan, duh.”

Lisa looked in between the two boys, the look in her eye was almost humorous.

“Of course, I thought it was after Nancy Reagan,” Whizzer deadpanned.

“It’s hard for me to take you seriously when you look like Old Spice,” Marvin shot back.

Whizzer sent a harmless glare Marvin’s way, silently realizing that he probably did look ridiculous.

“I should probably help Bob with the bales,” Lisa interjected, slyly snatching up Whizzer’s bucket and retreating out of the barn. If what Whizzer thought what was happening was happening, then   
Marvin certainly didn’t know about it.

Now that Lisa was gone, Marvin finally let out the giggles he was bottling up.

“Shut up,” Whizzer whined, “help me get down.”

Marvin continued to laugh, but also held Nancy still as Whizzer attempted to shimmy off. Marvin didn’t let go until Whizzer was through the gates and had basically collapsed from relief.

“That was probably the worst four minutes and twenty-three seconds of my entire life,” Whizzer sighed.

“You counted?”

“I don’t need your judgement, Marv, I’m perfectly capable of doing that on my own.”

“I’m sure.”

“It was seriously scary, the horse might as well be loose in a hospital.”

“What?”

“Sorry, I’ve been trying to sneak that joke in for the past twenty minutes and I just haven’t found a place to work it in.

“Yeah, it didn’t work.”

“Sorry I’m not meeting your cowboy criteria.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “I didn’t expect you to be out here, with, you know, animals.”

Whizzer narrowed his eyes. “I’m not as much of a city kid as you seem to believe.”

“Is that so?”

Whizzer nodded.

“Have you ever seen a chicken?”

“Of course I have.”

Marvin raised his eyebrows.”

“…On TV.”

“Do you wanna see one for real?”

_______

“They’re gonna bite my fingers with their beaks of death.”

Marvin shoved the whicker basket he was holding into Whizzer’s arms.

“Fine, you don’t have to go near them, I’ll get the eggs and you just…stand there and look pretty.”

“Awesome. I’m great at that.”

The chicken coop was small, there were only like a dozen hens in it. As soon as the two of them came in, they started bocking like crazy, likely expecting food.

“So…do you eat them?”

Marvin looked up from where he was currently grabbing eggs out from under a chicken’s butt. “The hens or the eggs?”

“Both.”

“Uh…yeah. The chickens aren’t really part of our income. We eat one every now and then, then we keep the eggs for ourselves and sell a few dozen to our neighbours.”

“They’re all different colours,” Whizzer observed, looking down at the eggs quickly filling his basket.

“Well, yeah.”

Once the basket was full, they returned to the house to put the eggs into cartons. Marvin’s Bubbe was already up and working away at her blanket, she almost seemed glad to see Whizzer out with Marvin. Time had flown by like a bullet; it was already past noon. After eating a couple of grilled cheeses Marvin’s Bubbe had prepared in anticipation of their arrival, Marvin took Whizzer by the wrist and dragged him downstairs.

Even though Whizzer would never admit it to Marvin, being outdoors out here actually wasn’t so bad. There was something quite reassuring about not having people around you all the time, just being out in the open by yourself. Well, that’s what Whizzer thought before he followed Marvin downstairs.

“I am not getting on that deathtrap.”

“It’s fine, you’ll wear a helmet.”

“You know who invented snowmobiles? Canadians. Those people are insane, they drink milk out of bags, eat ketchup chips, and put braille on their money, they aren’t to be trusted!”

“Actually, the braille thing is pretty smart-”

“I am not getting on that snowmobile, Marv.”

Marvin rolled his eyes. “You’re not even gonna be driving, you just sit on the back and hold onto me.”

Whizzer screwed up his face in thought. The snowmobile was weird and boxy, it looked like it was a billion years old. He wondered how this thing even moved, it was basically running on a glorified conveyor belt.

Whizzer crossed his arms. “I’ll get on that thing when pigs fly.”

________

Whizzer was waiting for bacon to start falling from the sky at any second, because that would be the only explanation as to why he was letting Marvin jam a motorcycle helmet over his head. He so quickly regretted anything he had said prior to this, because this was definitely the worst moment of his life.

Marvin started yanking out some weird pulley, reminiscent of a lawnmower. After a few pulls, the machine roared to life, practically bursting Whizzer’s eardrums.

“Fuck,” Whizzer whispered to himself, out of earshot of Marvin.

“Alright,” Marvin smiled, gesturing with his head for Whizzer to come closer, “We’re ready to go.”

Whizzer really wanted to back out and sprint in the other direction, but he was all dressed up and Marvin looked so excited, what else was he supposed to do? He did the only thing he felt he could do and hopped on the back of that damn snowmobile.

“What do I do?” Whizzer asked, his voice slightly shaky, his hands awkwardly hovering around as he tried to figure out what to do with them.

“Well if you don’t want to fly off the back, I’d suggest you hold on.”

“To what?”

“To me, moron.”

Right, the thing that made sense. Whizzer leant forward and wrapped his arms around Marvin’s waist, loosely to begin with. It wasn’t until Marvin pressed the throttle that Whizzer realized he had to hold on for dear life. As soon as they began to move, Whizzer felt like God was sucker punching him square in the chest.

Whizzer had always thought snowmobiles were odd contraptions, gliding across snow looking like they were glorified toboggans. But after he had gotten over the initial shock of being dragged forward, it was actually kind of nice. Sure, his breath would hitch every time they went over a bump, but there was something relaxing about letting Marvin take control and just enjoying the ride. It was a bit awkward with his helmet, and he quickly figured out that he had to have his head turned and leaning against Marvin’s shoulder. If anything, it made him feel more secure.

They moved across open fields, leaving a ladder-like pattern behind them. Whizzer didn’t even notice that his hands were basically freezing off, despite his wool mittens. He supposed there wasn’t much of a point to going snowmobiling like this, asides from the thrill. They weaved in and out of trees, through ditches, and occasionally across the roads. It wasn’t until they reached the crest of a rather tall hill that they finally stopped. Marvin switched off the machine and hopped off.

“What are we doing?” Whizzer questioned aloud.

“Nothing,” Marvin replied simply. He walked a few metres ahead until he reached a small cliff-like dip, and stopped, looking off into the distance.  
Whizzer paused for a moment, looking around and wondering why the hell Marvin decided to stop in the middle of some random field. Was this what country people do? Sure, the view was nice for Whizzer, but he’d never been out here before. He certainly never stopped in the middle of the street to ogle at the Empire State Building. Nevertheless, he took off his helmet and set it on the seat in front of him.

As soon as Whizzer stepped off the machine, he instantly sunk to his knees in snow. After several difficult steps that made Whizzer feel like he was wading through the Everglades, he finally reached Marvin. He looked at the other boy, then out to the field, then back to Marvin, then to the field again.

“So…” Whizzer started awkwardly, having grown bored quite quickly. He started making noises, clicking his tongue and tapping his hand. Whizzer was not known for his patience. “Is it just me or is it cold out here?”

“Yeah. Sure is.”

Whizzer crossed his arms and rubbed up and down his shoulders. He fidgeted, stepping back and forth, creating a splatter of footprints in the snow.

“You know, I think-”

Before Whizzer could finish his thought, he took a step to the side, landing in some unstable snow. He was caught off guard as he plummeted through the air and landed on his back deep into the snowbank. Marvin turned to see Whizzer just as his face scrunched up in reaction to the cold substance dissolving onto his face.

Marvin tried, he really tried to keep a straight face. But the sight of Whizzer’s startled expression made him break.

“Hey,” Whizzer whined as he tried to sit up, only for his hands to sink into the snow, “it’s not funny.”

“It really…is,” Marvin managed to wheeze out between giggles.

Whizzer narrowed his eyebrows, then raised his right hand. “Stop being a dick and help me up.”

Once Marvin’s giggles seized, he took Whizzer’s hand. What resulted, and what Marvin should probably have expected, was Whizzer pulling him forward and into the snow along with him. Marvin had managed to catch himself on his elbows so he didn’t directly faceplant, instead landing and hovering over Whizzer. He didn’t even realize the position he was in until their giggling seceded, and they were left in silence.

Whizzer looked up at Marvin, who looked back down at him. Sometimes Whizzer would forget how pretty Marvin’s eyes were until he had a chance to look at them. Eyes in general usually are pretty, but Marvin’s eyes contrasted in such a way with his curly hair that made them stand out even more.

Then, Marvin leaned down and kissed him.

Whizzer was caught off guard, to say the least. They were out in the open, and they certainly weren’t about to sleep together. What could he possibly be getting out of this?

All Whizzer was feeling was the cold snow on the back of his neck and the heat of the other boy’s lips. After a moment, Marvin pulled away and sat up. His face was a mixture of concern, mild panic, and something Whizzer couldn’t quite place.

“We should probably head back,” Marvin suddenly blurted out, quickly standing up and walking back to the snowmobile.

Whizzer stayed on the ground for a moment longer, confusion running through his head like an Olympic sprinter. The kiss was light, and quick, and harmless, yet Marvin seemed so disoriented by it. The only thing Whizzer could wonder was, why? Was it possible that there was actually more to this relationship than just the occasional hookup, at least in his mind?

Because if that was how Marvin felt, maybe it wasn’t such a bad feeling at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you want to see happen next!
> 
> After you do that, tell me your best joke, and it could be used in the next few chapters.


	19. Subway Cookies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Whizzer has a realization

Whizzer received a plethora of bear hugs from every member of Marvin’s family as they prepared to be on their way. When he first stepped into the house a week ago, he was prepared for it to be the worst week of his life. But now, after spending all this time with these people that practically adopted him. It was difficult to say goodbye. Marvin’s Bubbe gave him and extra ball of yard and made him promise to keep working on his scarf. She also sent him with a Tupperware full of leftovers.

“Make sure to come back for spring break,” Lisa insisted, finishing off Marvin’s hug. She then turned to Whizzer and hugged him as well. “And Whizzer, I hope I’ll be seeing more of you again.”

Whizzer smiled, it was impossible not to smile when Lisa spoke to you. “Thanks for having me.”

Lisa grabbed both of Whizzer’s shoulders as she lowered her voice and spoke in a softer tone. “And just know, you are always welcome here. We’re glad the two of you are happy together.”

Whizzer nodded, slightly confused by the wording, but also with a realization dawning over him.

“Alright,” Marvin sighed, not at all suspicious of what his mom just said. “I guess we should get going if we’re gonna make it back before sundown.”

And as they backed out of the house, Whizzer couldn’t help but think about Lisa’s words. It wasn’t until they had already made it back onto the highway that he actually said anything.

“Hey, Marvin?”

“Yeah.”

“I think your mom thinks we’re boyfriends.”

Marvin jerked the wheel slightly, barely recovering in enough time to avoid hitting the gravel shoulder.

“What? Why would you say that?”

“Uh…because it’s true?”

“No, it’s not.”

“Did you not hear her just now? ‘We’re glad the two of you are happy together.’ Who says that to two people that are just friends?”

“She didn’t mean it like that, she just worded it weird.”

“Yeah? Well earlier she told me she’s ‘glad you have someone, no matter the circumstances.’”

Marvin paused, gripping the steering wheel a little tighter than before. ”Maybe she meant friend circumstances?”

“Come on, you can’t obviously believe that.”

Marvin shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“This is good!” Whizzer smiled, hitting Marvin lightly on the arm, “she’s obviously okay with it, you don’t have to worry anymore!”

Marvin flinched away, his voice much sterner than Whizzer ever expected it to be. “It’s not like that. I can’t just…I can’t, okay?” He looked straight ahead as he spoke, ignoring Whizzer’s concerned looks.

Whizzer chose not to push any further, but stilled remained curious. It was difficult for him to understand why Marvin acted so distant whenever this subject was brought up. Whatever it was that was making him so uncomfortable, Whizzer wanted to fix it.

______________

“This is bad, this is bad,” Mendel repeated to himself.

They were sitting in a booth at Subway. While Mendel frantically ran his fingers through his hair, Cordelia calmly chewed on her sandwich, reaching for a chocolate chunk cookie.

“Take a chill pill,” she replied simply, breaking the cookie in half and chucking one half towards Mendel’s side of the table.

“How am I supposed to take a chill pill? Whizzer is gonna murder me, chop up my corpse, and mail the different parts to my relatives. You were never supposed to know, I was never supposed to know.”

“Relax, Whizzer won’t care, he’ll probably be relieved. And honestly, I’m mad at myself for not realizing Marvin was gay sooner. Now that I think about it, it’s actually pretty obvious.”

“No, Whizzer can’t know we know. I don’t think Marvin’s even out yet, we can’t tell anyone.”

Just as Mendel finished his sentence, Charlotte slid into the booth across from him.

“I can’t believe I didn’t figure out Marvin was gay,” she said thoughtfully, not noticing the look of Mendel’s face, which was a mix of disbelief and fear.

“You told her?” Mendel asked, his voice strained as he turned back to Cordelia.

“I can’t not tell her, she’s my girlfriend.”

Mendel frantically looked to Charlotte. “You didn’t tell Trina, did you?”

“Duh, of course not, I’m not stupid. But for real, I take great pride in my gay-dar and I’m just ashamed I didn’t notice earlier.”

Mendel sighed, resting his head in his hands. He had somehow managed to take his one job, and fuck it up in every single way possible. God, how did he let himself get tied up in this mess?

“I still haven’t got all the details though,” Charlotte pushed, leaning in towards Mendel. “How did you even find out about this?”

“It was an accident! I was just running back into my room real quick before my date with Trina, and then they just walked in there making out and stuff, not even knowing I was there. Thank god   
Whizzer noticed me before anything happened because I really did not need to be emotionally scarred that day.”

“That’s gonna be a yikes from me,” Charlotte replied, stealing Mendel’s half of the cookie. “But I would’ve thought that they’d act different around each other after that happened.”

“Well,” Mendel started, not even realizing the words already tumbling out of his mouth, “apparently it was happening back in September.”

“What!?” Cordelia and Charlotte whisper-shouted simultaneously.

“Fffffuck.”

“September?” Cordelia rasped. “You did not tell me about that.”

“Yeah, I didn’t mean to.”

“Why didn’t Marvin ever tell me about this?” Charlotte questioned aloud.

“He isn’t telling anyone,” Mendel replied with a shrug.

This caused Charlotte to furrow her eyebrows. “Why? There’s no way he can think we’re not gonna accept him.”

“Maybe it not about us,” Cordelia spoke up, causing the others to turn her way. Her voice took a serious tone, something that was a rare occurrence. “Maybe he’s not worried about us accepting him, but maybe he just can’t accept himself.”

“I will admit, that was pretty deep,” Mendel stated, “but I don’t get it. Why would he be mad at himself? It’s not like he hates gay people.”

“Look, I can’t speak for someone else’s internal homophobia, but I’ve dealt with it myself. It’s difficult to accept who you are when all these other parts of you are saying it’s wrong or invalid.”

“So what do we do?”

Cordelia rested her chin on her fist and sighed. “I don’t know.”


	20. Folding Tables

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I didn't intend for these to be F.R.I.E.N.D.S. references but whelp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is I, the rare spork goblin that appears once a month.
> 
> To be honest, I was pretty set about giving up on this, but then I got comments saying people wanted more chapters, so then I felt guilty. Here ya go my dudes.
> 
> Also, I typed this all in one night and didn't spell check it so...beware.

Whizzer had never been much of a romantic. Not in his entire life had he ever had a boyfriend, and for the longest time, he had intended on keeping it that way.

The second Whizzer stepped foot into the entertainment hall, he was overwhelmed by the small of garlic and butter. It was like an Italian restaurant had just sucker punched him in the face. The hall had been decorated to resemble and fancy but cozy restaurant. There were round folding tables littered across the floor, covered with tablecloths and fancy cutlery to make them look like they hadn’t been sitting in a storage shed for the past twelve months.

He stood impatiently near a bench just in the front entrance, shifting his weight from foot to foot. He checked his phone and put it in his pocket, then checked it again. Pairs of students slowly trickled in, checking in at a small podium before being led to a table. He was supposed to be meeting Trina, Mendel, and Marvin here for supper. Cordelia’s faculty was hosting a fundraiser for her program by holding a dinner for any students that paid to go. Trina insisted that they had to go and support for. For some reason, that support didn’t seem to include Charlotte, who was apparently at some sort of study group. This was odd, considering the new semester had just begun.

“Hey, man.”

Mendel shrugged off his jacket as he stepped through the door. It was snowing hard outside; Whizzer could see the snowflakes that were melting into Mendel’s curly hair. Trina followed close behind, tucking her mittens and hat into the sleeves of her coat. Whizzer was about to greet them, only to cut himself off when one last body walked through the door.

“Whizzer.”

“Marvin.”

Whizzer let the silence between them last a few seconds too long before turning his eyes back to Mendel.

“So, are we ready to rock ‘n roll?”

“Are you ready to stop talking like a suburban dad?”

“Shut it.”

The quartet approached the podium, where a young blond man with an apron stood. 

“Hi!” Trina smiled, choosing to speak for the rest of the group, which was probably for the best. “Four, please.”

The man raised his eyebrows, glanced down at the notebook in his hand, then looked back up. “I’m sorry, but we’re only serving tables of two, or groups of six to eight. We could group you up if another party of four comes in, or we could split you into twos.”

This caused Whizzer to narrow his eyes slightly. Surely Cordelia should have told them about this. He looked to Mendel, who was tapping his foot, then thought about Charlotte, who was missing for a study group.

Those fuckers knew everything.

“Oh,” Trina replied, turning quizzically to the group. “Maybe we should just split up, that way we can get seated right away.”

“Right,” Mendel quickly added. “I’ll go with Trina; Whizzer can go with Marvin.”

“Or,” Marvin interjected, “I could sit with Trina.”

“No, no,” Whizzer cut in, crossing his arms and staring Mendel right in the eyes, “I’d love to dine with you Marv, I think it’d be…pleasurable.”

He couldn’t see Marvin’s reaction, but he could see how Mendel’s eyes began to widen as he realized that Whizzer knew that Mendel knew that the lesbians knew. Whenever Whizzer did his “matter-of-fact” voice like that, it meant something was up. There were several moments of silence as Whizzer stared down an increasingly panicky Mendel.

“…Alrighty then,” the blond waiter said, awkwardly inserting himself into the conversation. “This way to your tables.”

Mendel quickly spun to follow blondie, averting any eye contact. Trina still seemed oblivious to the whole thing, happily following along. Marvin didn’t immediately say anything, surprisingly, not until they were seating at an oddly romantically set-up folding table.

“What the hell?” Marvin asked, once the waiter was out of earshot.

“What?”

“Why did you say it like that?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, I just can’t wait to deepthroat this spaghetti.”

Marvin’s face scrunched up. “Stop phrasing things like that! We are in a public place for God’s sake.”

“Like what?”

“Weirdly erotic.”

“Well I’m sorry, but I’m just hungry for a nice, thick, hard, loaf of garlic bread.”

“Jesus Christ.” Marvin lowered his head and shielded his eyes.

“Ah,” Whizzer sighed as he took a long sip of water. “Don’t you just love water? Just so cold, and moist, and wet. I could just slurp and lick it all-”

“Um, excuse me.”

Poor blondie was hovering over them with a conflicted look on his face. Marvin’s face turned pink, but at the same time he was having a hard time containing his muffled laughs. On the other hand, Whizzer didn’t even flinch.

“Hey there…” Whizzer replied, squinting slightly to read the waiter’s nametag, “…Matt.”

“Um,” blondie’s face was also turning red, “I can get you a drink while you wait for your food, if you’d like.”

“I’ll have a coffee with creamer,” Marvin said, having calmed down.

“I’ll get-” Whizzer started, before being cut off.

“He’ll have water,” Marvin interjected, looking at blondie with the most serious expression he could muster. “He loves water.”

________

 

Cordelia tried not to sweat all over the food.

This was a difficult task, considering how hot it was in their cramped little kitchen. It was currently her job to figure out how to make a past sauce for a gluten-free vegan who doesn’t like garlic. She wasn’t judging anyone’s food preferences or restrictions but damn, this was basically an impossible task.

“Delia?”

Cordelia whipped her head around to search for the familiar voice. She immediately spotted Charlotte, looking rather uncomfortable in the clusterfuck of a kitchen. She shuffled over to where Charlotte was, who looked relieved to finally see her girlfriend.

“So,” Cordelia started, “did it work?”

Charlotte nodded, glancing to the doors leading out to the dining area. “Yeah, they’re together.”

“What about Mendel?”

“Chill, I’m just about to.”

Charlotte pulled out her phone and dialled Mendel’s number.

_“Hello, this is Mendel Weisenbachfeld.”_

“I know it’s you, Mendel, I’m the one that called you.”

_“Right.”_

“Anyways, so there’s some terrible emergency and I need you to return to your dorm ASAP.”

_“I don’t support this tomfoolery.”_

“Too late, you’ve been tomfooled. Tell Trina your mom had a heart attack.”

_“I’m not gonna do that.”_

“Then tell her you feel a fever coming on.”

There was some silence on the other line as Mendel considered it.

“Fine, but Whizzer’s definitely gonna know what’s up,” he whispered. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, good luck my straight bro.”

Cordelia looked back at her in anticipation as she hung up the phone.

“And?”

“The parent trap is a go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey my dudes.
> 
> If you want to see more, shoot me some suggestions for what you want to see happen next.
> 
> Or I may just disappear for another month until I get another idea.
> 
> I guess we'll see what happens.
> 
> :D


	21. The Parent Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whelp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof to all the people who told me not to quit and made me feel guilty enough to write this chapter. This one's for you.
> 
> Also, excuse the lack of spell check.

Whizzer took two deep breaths as he made a last minute decision about what to say next.

“Marvin. I’m gonna say something, and I’m knowingly choosing to say it in a public place because I know you’re the type of person the doesn’t like to make scenes in these sort of situations.”

Marvin raised an eyebrow, wondering if he should be worried.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Yeah Marvin definitely should have been worried. However, rather than doing something logical such as talking, he instead looked Whizzer in the eye and stayed frozen in his seat. He took a sip of his drink, then set it down, then continued to sit in silence. He suddenly took an interest in the bowl of bread in front of him. It looked rather undercooked, which raised Marvin’s concern with the future careers of the kids at thing university.

“Marvin?”

“What?”

“Are you gonna say something?”

Marvin looked up from the unappetising bread bowl. “You were right. I’m not going to make a scene, even though I very much want to right now.”

Whizzer blinked; his forehead slightly crinkled at he braced for what came next. Maybe he calculated this conversation incorrectly.

“I have to admit, this wasn’t really how I was expecting you to react.”

“What did you think?” Marvin shot back, his face growing hot, “that I was gonna crawl onto the table and kiss you, then we’d run off into the sunset?”

“Well, not exactly, but I was at least hoping for a crisp high fi-”

“No, Whizzer, that’s not what this is, that’s never what this was gonna be. This isn’t some poorly written enemies-to-friends romance novel where it turns out we were in love this whole time. This is a poorly written coming of age novel where you’re just a bump in the road of my life, and at the end of it I adopt a cat named Atticus or whatever. This is exactly what we said it’d be, nothing more.”

Whizzer leaned back in his chair, trading in his embarrassment for annoyance. “So what? You’re just gonna barricade yourself in the closet and pretend this isn’t happening?”

“Keep your voice down-”

“Because I may have misread this situation, but I think you’ve misread your own feelings.”

“So, what? You’re telling me what my feelings are?”

“Yeah, I am, after all, you’re the one who thinks you can pretend to be straight for the rest of your life. Well guess what Marvin, no one’s buying it, you have Cher CDs in your glovebox for God’s sake.”

“Those were a birthday gift-”

“The receipt was taped to the packaging and it wasn’t a gift receipt.”

“Fuck you.”

“You already have.”

Marvin didn’t realize how far forward he was in his seat until he leant back. Luckily, they were in a room full of very loud twenty somethings that were either too absorbed in their phones or their own conversation to care what was happening at Marvin and Whizzer’s table.

“You and I both know that I’m fully capable of making a scene, even if you aren’t,” Whizzer said in a hushed tone, noticing Marvin’s mild distress.

Marvin crossed his arms, not letting up. “It’s not my fault you got so emotional about this; this was supposed to be purely physical.”

“Well I’m sorry my feelings are getting in the way of your plans. I’m sorry I’m not just a piece of flesh you can have sex with whenever you feel like it.”

“Don’t get all victim-y on me, you used me just as much as I used you.”

“I don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to admit that you actually care for me. You keep saying that this thing between us doesn’t mean anything, but I don’t believe that for a second. You’re acting like a child.”

“I’m not a child.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Uh-huh.”

Marvin glared back at the man across him, recognizing the trap that had been placed in front of him.

“Look,” he started. “I didn’t sign up for emotional attachment, okay?”

“We never do, do we?” Whizzer shot back. “I don’t know why I’m even attracted to you, you’re the biggest jackass I’ve ever known. You’re selfish, annoying, a know-it-all. At this point, I would give anything to let these feeling die, but it seems that’s not where life is taking me, is it?”

Marvin crossed his arms like a stubborn child. “Maybe you should try a little harder.”

Whizzer took a deep breath, then stood up. “You know what, at this point, I don’t even care.”

But Whizzer did care. He cared a lot, and he knew in the deepest part of his soul that Marvin cared too. So, he took a shot.

“Look, we can end this, if that’s what you really want. But for that to happen, you have to look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me.”

Marvin froze. Fuck, this really was like a poorly written romance novel. His face softened as he looked up to Whizzer, who was now towering over him. This was pretty dramatic, and Whizzer was amazed that no one had noticed the moment they were having over at their little table. If you could bottle up this moment and sell it, it would beat Titanic at the box office. Marvin took a deep breath, then stood up as well.

“I don’t love you.”

________

Cordelia popped out of the side door to meet her boo, who was wrapped up in several scarves. Cordelia, on the other hand, was already far too warm from the hot kitchen, and was using this as an excuse to cool off.

“How’s it going in there?” Charlotte inquired.

“Just cleaning up, most people are beginning to clear out.”

She nodded, wrapping her arms around herself to keep warm. Cordelia took this as a cue and nuzzled into the arms of her girlfriend. From this spot, they could see the front doors of the building.

“How do you think it’s going in there?” Asked Cordelia, referring to the Parent Trap.

“I’m sure they can’t keep their eyes off each other.”

Suddenly, something caught the pair’s attention. The front doors swung open and a certain brown-haired man exited onto the pavement.

“There’s Whizzer,” Cordelia announced, stating what they were both thinking.

They watched from a distanced as Whizzer pulled out his phone and began typing on it. A few moments later, Cordelia took out her phone to quickly check her texts. “He wants to know where I am.”

They turned back to where Whizzer was. The front door opened again and Marvin emerged.

“There he is!” Cordelia squealed, as if they were watching a movie.

Marvin began to walk forward, also looking at his phone. In fact, he was so distracted that he walked right into Whizzer’s back. They both jumped backwards, startled. Then they sort of looked at one another, nodded, and walked in opposite directions.

Charlotte looked to Cordelia, who looked back.

“I don’t think this could have gone better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is also dedicated to a province-wide power outage that caused me to be without water, WiFi, power, or heat for 8 days. 
> 
> I was straight-up not having a good time.


	22. Rice Cakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Uh, Trina?”
> 
> “Why the FUCK is there no rice in this house?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I kinda fell off the face of the Earth. Also, it probably would've been more appropriate to post this on New Year's, but I live dangerously.
> 
> Enjoy, my dudes

December 31st  
10:05 PM

 

Marvin

The air outside was cold, and Marvin had regretted taking the bus. Sure, he had made it to the house, but he knew that the journey back would be much worse, and would involve much more waiting around. Maybe he could get a ride from Trina.

Perhaps it wasn’t a stroke of genius to wait outside a door after a series of small knocks, expecting anyone to come greet him when he could barely hear himself think above the noise coming from inside. With that quick and painful realization, Marvin let himself in.

He didn’t know who’s house it was. One of Mendel’s therapist friends, he thought. It certainly wasn’t a sorority, but the promise of free drinks and a place to make out with someone when the clock struck twelve quickly traveled around campus, and allowed for a plethora of students to fill the inside of this sad suburban structure enough to force Marvin to narrow his shoulders as he navigated the crowd.

He had only come at the insistence of Cordelia and Charlotte. Why, he didn’t know. They would do what they always did, and left him alone in the party as they went off to mingle and socialize.   
Marvin was never good at that, he needed someone to stick to in situations like these. At this point, his best course of action was to walk loops around the house pretending he had a purpose, which was better than shrinking back into a corner and wishing he had just stayed home.

Destination no. 1: the kitchen. He might as well pick up a drink before beginning to quest to wander around aimlessly. Luckily, the kitchen wasn’t two hard to find. He’d been in many a suburban home before, and they all seemed to be set up the exact same. It was much less crowded than the living room, which was greatly appreciated. An array of cheap alcohol was spread across the island, used and new solo cups spread throughout. Marvin, being the gentleman (and baby) that he was, elected to go with orange juice instead of a drink. He took his time filling his cup, looking for any reason to occupy himself. Maybe he could just sneak upstairs and lock himself in the bathroom until the night was over, watch some Downton Abbey on his phone, and wait until someone found him.  
These were all wonderful thoughts, but he also knew that he would hate himself if he started the new year off alone in a bathtub.

 

Trina

Mendel was technically the one in the front pulling her along, but Trina was the one leading Mendel. He was trying his best to take the lead and pretend he knew what he was doing, but frankly, he was failing. As they weaved through the crowds and out to the back, she knew Mendel was just waiting to run into someone they knew so he would no longer have to have authority.

“Gah!”

“Watch it!”

Mendel had somehow managed to catapult the two of them straight into Whizzer, who was balancing a cup in his hand as he talked.

“Sorry!” Mendel apologized profusely, but visibly relaxed when he saw it was Whizzer they had collided with, and not just some stranger. 

“Geeze, I don’t know how you manage to fall face first into anything that’s slightly in your path.”

Mendel shrugged, still looking incredibly guilty.

“What are you doing out here?” Trina offered.

There were few people outside, likely due to the fact that it was winter in New York. The weather could have been worse, it was still above freezing, but it certainly wasn’t nice to stand around in.

“Cordelia’s trying to set up the hot tub to dunk around in.”

“Hot tubbing? It’s freezing.”

“Hence the ‘hot tub.’”

Well, Trina couldn’t argue with that.

“I got it!” They heard Cordelia exclaim from up on the deck. Trina could see her head pop up and wave them over, noticing the enlarged audience.

They made their way over, an easy path to follow towards the hefty amount of steam drifting away from the hot tub.

“I don’t have a bathing suit,” Trina pointed out, brows knitted with concern.

“You’ve got natures bathing suit right there, baby,” Cordelia replied with a grin, causing Mendel’s eyes to grow wide.

“Chill,” Whizzer interjected, “just keep your underwear on.”

There was something magical about how Cordelia and Whizzer managed to paint absurd ideas as being absolutely reasonable.

Whizzer, Cordelia, and Charlotte were quick to start throwing their clothes off, draping them on the porch and hopping into the hot tub. Sometimes Trina couldn’t help but wonder how her friends lived happily with so little shame.

“Are we sure this is such a good idea?” Mendel inquired, “what if we got hypothermia and died?”

“Sounds like a hell of a way to go,” Charlotte admitted.

“No one’s forcing you to get in,” Whizzer drawled. “Do what you want.”

Mendel hesitated. “You know what, fuck it.”

He started madly pulling his sweater off, causing the others to cheer in encouragement. However all that cheering stopped when Mendel’s cell phone flew out of his pocket and straight into the hot tub. The five of them just froze for a moment, slow in their reactions.

“Oh, shit,” Mendel finally said.

This triggered frantic searching from the inhabitants of the hot tub, which eventually resulted in Whizzer diving under until he resurfaced with the phone. Trina quickly grabbed it and bolted indoors, knowing what she had to do. She had never been the commanding type, but as she sprinted through the halls of that house, showving people out of the way, she had never felt more powerful.

She didn’t even notice Marvin standing a foot away with a confused expression as she wildly rummaged through the cupboards.

“Uh, Trina?”

“Why the FUCK is there no rice in this house?”

 

Whizzer

Whizzer was hot on her tails as she sped into the house. He couldn’t help but feel partially responsible for encouraging Mendel into the hot tub. He had dropped many phones into the sink before when doing the dishes, so he knew exactly what needed to happen next.

“Trina, we need to find ri-”

Rather than coming across his friend, calmly putting Mendel’s phone into grain, Whizzer stumbled upon something he’d rather unsee. It was Trina and Marvin, both in the kitchen, except Marvin was beating a plastic package with the bottom of a wine bottle as Trina attempted to shove bits of what appeared to be crushed up cereal into the charging port of Mendel’s cell phone.

“What the fuck?”

Marvin and Trina both looked up, as if two children who had been caught looking at Christmas gifts.

There was a long pause, as the three parties struggled to come up with an explanation for anything that had just occurred in those last three seconds.

“I couldn’t find rice…” Trina began timidly, “so I though rice cakes might work fine.”

Whizzer turned his gaze to Marvin’s workspace, but not to Marvin. His hands were covered in rice cake dust, and he seemed rather panicked.

It was as this moment that Whizzer remembered he was standing in the kitchen, sopping wet, in his underwear. It was also during this time that he decided it would be a grand idea to turn around and leave.

 

Charlotte

“Whelp, this was fun while it lasted.”

“We’ve only been here for like two seconds.”

“Two seconds of utter euphoria.”

She lifted herself out of the hot tub and put her clothes back on. This proved to be inconvenient, as she was cold and wet. Cordelia, not wanting to sit there alone, followed her.

“Well, now what?”

This statement didn’t have any effect for very long, as not two seconds later, a commotion erupted inside. The trio sprinted over, both wanting to be back where the heating was and back where the drama was. It turned out to be nothing to special, just to drunk economic majors that insulted each other one two many times, and were now brawling in the living room. A small group of students formed around them, no one daring to intervene. That was, until Whizzer cut through the crowd and grabbed the larger boy, ripping him away from the fight. It was at this point that everyone else decided they should help, and a few others grabbed onto the second boy to keep the two separated. It was over in an instant, and the crowd quickly dispersed.

“Wild shit, huh?” 

Charlotte looked across the room to where Whizzer was walking over. His hair was sticking up in all different directions, parts of it even frozen in place. 

“Personally, I’d call it a good time.”

Whizzer couldn’t hold back his smirk. “Of course you would. Drinks, anyone?”

 

11:56

Marvin

“Do you think anyone’s gonna notice?”

The pair turned back to the island, which was now covered in rice cake dust. It was admittedly, very noticeable.

“Nah, I think we’re good,”

Marvin took this as a sufficient reassurance and began to back out the kitchen with Trina on his tail.

“Should we go find everyone else?” Trina asked.

“Should we?” Marvin replied hesitantly. “I mean, I don’t really wanna go outside,” he reasoned, in an attempt to poorly hide the truth.

“I guess you’re right. It’s almost midnight anyway, we should regroup in the living room.”

That seemed like a good plan to Marvin, but it also seemed like it would result in him running into the others anyway. The two of them emerged in the living room, which was already packed. Marvin lead Trina partway up the stairs so they could have a better overview of the house.

“There, over by the door.” 

Trina pointed over the crowd, and Marvin followed her gaze. The other four members of their group were standing across the room, only just noticing them now. Trina squeezed Marvin’s hand before letting go and scurrying through the crowd towards Mendel. Marvin stayed put.

“10!”

Oh, it was midnight already.

“9!”

The room began to fill even more, and even though Marvin was up on the stairs, he was still being shoved against other people.

“8!” 

The sounds of people’s chants were almost deafening.

“7!”

She saw Charlotte wrap her arms around Cordelia from across the room.

“6!”

Trina grinned as she looked towards Mendel.

“5!”

Marvin began to feel uncomfortable at the thought of a bunch of people making out around him.

“4!”

Was it hot in here or was it just him?

“3!”

Marvin struggled to figure out what to do next.

“2!”

Marvin looked across the room, and his eyes locked with Whizzer.

“1!”

Neither of them pulled away from their locked gaze. And as everyone around them was absorbed in their own world, so were Whizzer and Marvin.

It was at that moment the Marvin finally realized something. He wanted to be kissing Whizzer at that moment. Not because he wanted to use him or figure himself out, but because he was in love   
with Whizzer Brown.

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rock and roll
> 
> Also I didn't edit this so my bad


End file.
